The Rize Magazine January 2014 | Page 16

Andrea Wheaton

Written by

Adults get bullied too

Today, I am not going to speak to that group of victims. There is a whole segment of society which is silent on the topic of bullying. Adults! Yes, grown ups get bullied too! Because we are grown ups we should be able to handle life in the work place, right? Nope, adults are victims too. Kids who bully grow up to become adults who bully.

You may be asking, 'how is this possible, we are all grown up and can stand up for ourselves?' As adults we experience bullying in the workplace. It can be in the form of abusive authority, humiliation, psychological harassment, and or emotional abuse.

The tactics the bully uses range from tattle tailing, teasing, poking fun, threats, claiming work that does not belong to them, spreading rumours, humiliation, and name calling to mention a few.

Jealousy is most often the green eyed monster which propels the bully into action. Insecurity is an other motivator. The bully needs to put others down in order to uplift themselves. Sadly, like children, adults fall prey to these purveyors of pain and fail to report the abuse. And, like children, they are afraid to report the bullying to the proper authorities in the workplace because they are embarrassed to do so. Embarrassed because the are adults and should be able to take care of themselves.

The bully finds a target, someone vulnerable and quiet or they find some sort of error a person has done and uses it as blackmail to have power over the victim. Case in point, A man is known as a Casanova among women. His method is to pick vulnerable women who are going through a separation or divorce, he seduces them one by one and when they fall for his game and for him, he brushes them off claiming they are married. The women are hurt and pursue him further and he threatens them, telling them he will reveal the affair with their husbands. They are threatened into silence for fear their husbands will find out. Then on he goes to his next victim to continue his sexual harassment.

Nearly everyday there are news reports about bullying. Kids being bullied at school or the growing phenomenon, cyberbullying. We hear of the 'no tolerance' or 'zero tolerance' rules in schools to 'protect' the children. Does it work? Not very well if we look at the statistics and the rise of juvenile suicide.