• Limited grandparent influence. Fewer than one in four
grandparents understand their role according to the
Bible and as a result, have a minimal impact on the faith
of children and grandchildren. 5
• Unhealthy reliance on children’s or youth ministry.
Barna discovered only one in six senior pastors believe
getting parents involved with spiritual formation is
a top goal for youth ministry. Parents generally rely
upon the church to do all the religious training their
children will receive.
• Some pastors disciple others but not their own children. A
pastor told me, “I don’t talk about parenting much with
the congregation because I didn’t do a good job with
my own children.” If we don’t win at home, we have no
business exporting it elsewhere, which is why one-third
of the qualifications for elders from 1 Timothy 3 deal
with the home.
Many pastors and families are relying on this pattern for
the spiritual training of children, and the results are not
good. Renewanation has two assessments to help ministry
leaders: the church revitalization consultation and biblical
worldview survey. Over the years, I’ve developed assess-
ments for the spiritual formation of children, spiritual
gifts test for children, student mission trips, and family
discipleship. If you would like more information, email
[email protected].
CHARACTERISTIC #2: GODLY LEADERSHIP
(2 Timothy 3:5-9)
Godly leadership is the mark of a vibrant family ministry.
Churches whither and die without godly leaders who teach
sound doctrine, which is why Paul is so concerned about
false teachers in his letters (see Acts 20:29-31).
According to Paul, the individuals we place in front of
children to teach them truth is soul-shaping, eternity-
impacting, and an area we must devote significant attention.
For Paul, the convictions and beliefs of leaders are of critical
importance. Remember, Jesus said that it is better to place a
millstone around our neck and drown than to lead a young
person astray (Matt 18:6). Teaching children is a high and
holy calling, and it requires we take great care when recruit-
ing individuals to teach our young people.
Paul warns there are individuals who “have the appear-
ance of godliness, but deny its power. Avoid such people”
(3:5). When children sit under their leadership, they may
be “led astray by various passions, always learning but never
able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth” (3:6-7). The stakes
couldn’t be higher. We must approach the forming of minds
with the same care and concern that God does.
Paul describes these individuals—who are within the
Church—as seeking to draw people away from Christ
with an alternative version of the truth. Here’s the point:
44
everyone who appears godly is not. We must be careful
not to allow the appearance of spiritual health to fool us,
and we must be on guard against false teaching as it has
the potential to capture individuals, lead them into error,
and cause unbelief.
Here are three priorities I’ve learned over the years
that help children and youth ministries recruit and train
godly leaders.
• Evaluate the leaders and teachers you have according
to the criteria of Scripture, which Paul provides in 2
Timothy 3:10-11. God’s criteria may require that you
remove or repurpose some individuals from their area
of ministry.
• Create an interview process. My process included
in-depth doctrinal questions, a review of our statement
of faith, a discussion of our philosophy of ministry, ques-
tions about their spiritual state, motivation for serving,
and family situation. I always asked the question, “Is
there any reason you cannot say to a young person with
full integrity, imitate me as I imitate Christ?” Individu-
als who sounded qualified to serve often answered this
question by stating they were struggling with sexual sin
or had never developed spiritual habits.
• Establish a robust teacher training process. I provid-
ed worldview training for all my volunteers as well as
safety policies and ministry expectations. The training
equates to 20-30 hours of listening, reading, and study,
and all but one hour was available online.
CHARACTERISTIC #3: A DEFINITION AND PLAN
FOR DISCIPLESHIP (2 Timothy 3:10-11)
I find many churches mean conversion when they say disci-
pleship. They struggle to move people through a disciple-
ship process and do not have an intentional plan regarding
what it means to become a disciple.
We are in the business of making disciples. How are we to
do that well if we do not have clarity on what a disciple is,
do not have a process to make disciples, and do not check
our results?
Our understanding of discipleship is important because
it determines everything from who we hire, to the curricu-
lum we choose, to the programs we put in place. These help
us accomplish the goal of making disciples. Every church
needs to clearly define discipleship and seek organizational
alignment around implementation. I’ll get you started with
a very concise definition.
Jesus defined discipleship in two words: “follow me.” A
disciple is a learner whose goal is to become like Jesus in
character and help others do the same. Discipleship is the
entire process of coming to faith and growing in spiritual
maturity as a follower of Christ (Col 1:28-29). It is an invita-
tion to orient our affections and desires to God’s and is the