The Perfect Gentleman Issue 8 - Halloween | Page 28

Uncle Henry
Turn the Mobile Off - All mobile phones should be at the very least placed on “airplane mode”, but
preferably turned off. This means that they certainly won’t ring during a show and if they are turned
off then they won’t be a distraction to you during the show. If you need to check it for work or
something important turn it on during the interval and then switch off again.
Keep Food from the Theatre - You are not in a restaurant, bar or cafe. Leave the food alone. If you have
some snack, when the curtain goes up the bag of toffees goes down and stays down till the end. This is
also true of drinking, the exception is some comedy performances occur where beverages can be
obtained. Feel free to drink them but don’t disturb the performance or the audience trying to get
another round in whilst there is a chap on stage - you will do so at your peril.
Silence is Golden - Please don’t talk during the show. It is exceptionally rude to both your neighbours
and the actors and if they are distracted you will not get the best out of them. Tammy, as you found
out, it can get you ejected!
If you are unfortunate to suffer a coughing fit, it happens to all of us, place your hand over your
mouth and, if you have a handkerchief to hand, use that. If you need a sip of water or a lozenge do it
swiftly and quietly.
Finally, this is not the X-Factor, keep your singing and humming voice to yourself, unless asked to join
in.
Sit Still - Once you are comfortable as you can be in a theatre seat, try not to move to much, don’t
fidget and certainly don’t lean back and rest your feet on the seat in front (I have seen it happen). Also,
if you are late or need to excuse yourself, do it as quietly and as politely as possible. In the latter case,
you should have used the facilities beforehand.
Be Considerate - Applaud at appropriate times, in a musical you can applaud after a song or section if it
struck a chord. Only do a standing ovation if you really think it was the best thing you have seen.
You are there for a shared experience and it is not your couch at home, therefore think of the others
around you and think of their enjoyment as your own.
What I have outlined here applies to any event that is held in an auditorium no matter what the size
from a ballet to a comedy performance, from an opera to jazz concert. All these fall into this same
category.
You have generally paid a great deal of money to see/listen/feel the performance of the people in
front of you. Therefore show them respect for their craft and respect for the rest of audience.
To calm my nerves, I am off to watch a black and white movie where they all dressed for the theatre…
Toodle Pip,

Uncle Henry

28

Uncle Henry