ThePADDLER 8
AdobeStock _ 129921620 . By moodboard
WHY ? I looked back to all the ‘ what if ’ moments . I looked back to those times when I received that phone call or email from the other side of the world . How do we balance our pleasure with the pain of loss ? People say that if you are in this sport long enough , you will be asked to question why ? The questions kept coming – too many for now .
As the country opened up and we were allowed back on rivers . I knew I needed to relight the fire . I know I needed to find pleasure again . I retraced my paddle strokes – one river at a time . I went back to the class 2 river sections that scared me in my youth – those industrial weirs in Yorkshire , littered with graffiti and pollution . I paddled older boats , which I had used in my early days , made those same moves as best my memory could remember and built my time again . I ate cake and walked away from rivers that I just didn ’ t feel happy with . If it ’ s not a pleasure , it ’ s pain , and no one needs that for the sake of leisure . I saw that beauty doesn ’ t need to be in the crystal blue of the torrents in national parks . I experienced magic in these little rivers of heritage . I paddled alone for the peace but in groups for the feeling of inclusion .
HAVE FUN As the rain falls and I see the rivers flow and dance again , I am content in the knowledge that this is fun . It doesn ’ t matter if others think it was a good day or a bad day ; what matters is you understand the journey - what matters is the fun . It is only you and the river . It isn ’ t about the boat you ride or the river you choose . It is about what the flow can give you . It is about the places that set you on a course of discovery . I am ok with that . Deep gorges or not , I know answers will come . Lessons will be taught , and I will be a pupil whether I want to be or not .
AdobeStock _ 211359322 . By Pawel