Frs . Tom Welk , Joe Uecker , Bill Walter enjoy some down time during Marillac ii .
Honing the Skills of Community Life by Fr . Joe Nassal , c . pp . s ., Provincial Director
American novelist , poet , environmentalist and farmer , Wendell Berry , once mused , “ Community , I am beginning to understand , is made through a skill I have never learned or valued : the ability to pass time with people you do not and will not know well , talking about nothing in particular , with no end in mind , just to build trust , just to be sure of each other , just to be neighborly .”
For the past year or so , members of the Kansas City Province have been gathering in dyads , intentional interviews , and as a larger group to focus on our future as a religious community . We are engaged in a process of “ Contemplative Conversation ,” of going deeper into the mystery of our relationship and the bond of charity . In many ways , we are practicing a skill that many of us never learned , though unlike Berry , many of us did value : community . Though we spent many years in formation for ministry and community life , the focus was on ministry . Community life was a means to support the apostolate . We are , after all , not a monastic community ; we are a Society of Apostolic Life . In the words of our founding provincial , “ We exist for the apostolate .”
So many of us grew up with the idea that to be in community meant being “ good neighbors ” to one
6 • The New Wine Press • November 2016 another . Try not to annoy or bother one another . I recall one of the members being told when he moved into a community house many years ago , “ The number one rule here is don ’ t bother anyone else .” That sets a low bar for the bond of charity . Instead of being “ brother ” to another , the suggestion was “ don ’ t bother .”
Expectations of community life are higher than this though we often confuse living in community with living in common . The latter isn ’ t necessarily community and is often captured in the well-worn phrase , “ living alone together .” The desire for a deeper communion , a deeper conversation , beyond the talk about the weather or the game last night or how many weddings or funerals you had the last year is what members of the Kansas City Province have been addressing this past year .
This is hard work . As Berry points out , “ A community is not something that you have , like a camcorder or a breakfast nook . No , it is something you do . And you have to do it all the time .” So , how are we “ doing ” community ? We often don ’ t think of “ doing ” community as we talk about “ being ” in community . But community is about doing those things that respect and reverence the dignity of the brothers and sisters