The New Social Worker Vol. 19, No. 4, Fall 2012 | Page 30

Reviews
The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties
Matter—And How To Make the Most of Them
Now, by Meg Jay, Ph.D., Twelve: New York,
2012, $22.99 hardcover.

new ideas and to take new risks, as well as
pointing out that there are necessary considerations to be made physically, even
when a person is at an age at which such
has never had to be considered before.

Overall, this book may be used
in three ways: for a clinician or parent
looking to better understand the current
life struggles of those in their 20s, for a
twenty-something to read simply to enjoy
the clients’ stories, or for a twenty-something to read and use as a guidebook. Although the first two are very valid reasons
to enjoy this book, its true impact is most
evident when a reader chooses the third
option. Although not every section may
feel completely personal (if, for example,
you’ve already married, the middle section might not be as poignant for you as
the others, or if you do not want to have
children, there are areas of the final section that won’t apply), having a professional help the reader to begin to consider
his/her life choices and how decisions
made now will impact future life options
is something that many find a gentle but
effective wake-up call.

While society often touts slogans like,
“thirty is the new twenty” and “you only
live once,” at the same time that the job
market has become a more treacherous
place than ever, it has become very easy
for twenty-somethings to feel that this is
the time to live it up and that the time to
work is later. In this book, Dr. Jay, a clinical psychologist specializing in adult development in twenty-somethings, attempts
to dissect the span of time that often
seems vast and uncertain to those ranging
from ages 20-29. Divided into three sections, this book covers the general areas of
work, love, and the brain and the body.

In the “Work” section, Dr. Jay uses
client interactions and parts of her clients’
sessions to illustrate the frequency with
which younger people find themselves unable to navigate the waters between finishing their education and settling into their
careers. For some, this occurs because
the person feels overwhelmed by the
number of options that exist. For others,
it seems that there will never be another
opportunity to enjoy life and to be young
and free, and the idea of focusing on work
pales in importance. Regardless of the
reasoning, Dr. Jay’s work with her clients
helps to show the reader ways in which
to combat the uncertainty and to begin
to make a plan to reach the professional
place they wish to find themselves later in
life, rather than to miss opportunities that,
although they seem endless, might only
be options for a short while.

In the “Love” section, clients’ discussions and struggles with current relationships helps the reader to understand
fears of not finding the right life partner,
whether they are due to being in inappropriate relationships or being uncomfortable with the idea of seeking a relationship at all. Dr. Jay helps clients to clarify
their own priorities, to figure out whether
a current partner is the right long-term fit,
or when to focus elsewhere rather than to
put all of one’s effort into finding a mate.

In “The Brain and the Body,” Dr. Jay
cites medical cases and personal client
interactions in which there are discussions
about the ability for the brain to create

Domestic violence, elder abuse, and
workplace harassment: these may not be
words that are generally grouped under
different types of bullying, but that is
exactly what the editors attempt to do in
Bullying in Different Contexts. The definition of bullying is largely debated by the
contributors; in the end, the editors contend that there are several definitions of
bullying. This gives the reader an in-depth
background on what bullying means in
different areas. However, it makes the
reader question how useful and prevalent
the text is in an educational and/or social
environment.

Monks and Coyne begin the book by
giving a summary of the book’s contents.
The following nine chapters discuss bullying in various arenas. Chapters two and
three introduce readers to bullying that
happens at preschool to school age levels.
Although it many times does not take
place between school walls, cyberbullying
is something that children and adolescents
have to face as well (covered in Chapter

28

Fall 2012

The New Social Worker

Reviewed by Kristen Marie (Kryss) Shane,
MSW, LSW, LMSW.
Bullying in Different Contexts, edi