The Mind Creative
At a lunch in celebration of her official 80th birthday, Queen
Elizabeth II amused her audience with this quotation from
Groucho Marx: “Anyone can get old; all you have to do is live long
enough.”
The truth, however, is that while everyone wants to live long, no
one wants to get old. And with good reason too. For most
people, being old is not just a pain in the ass; it is quite literally
a pain all over. The bones creak, the spine stoops, the joints hurt
and the flesh, or what is left of it, is often sore. The trembling
hand will not hold, the remaining teeth will not chew and the
over-used stomach will not digest.
Furthermore, the blood pressure and the blood sugar level will
either be too high or too low, never just right. Bone density will
definitely be low when it should be high and the reverse will be
true for cholesterol level, high when it should be low. Whereas
the blocked arteries will not let blood pass freely, the bladder will
not hold, allowing an embarrassingly free flow. Cardiac arrest,
renal failure, hip fracture, soft bones and tissue decay are the
terms in currency. It is Murphy’s Law in old age: everything that
can possibly go wrong, will go wrong.
No jam or butter over one’s toast in the
waning years. One must avoid eggs and
desist from sweets, pastries and cakes. Pickles are too acidic and fried food does an old
man no good. Chocolates are out. And, of
course, one better quit drinking and smoking
before it’s too late, whatever that means.
Keeping awake during the day is hard, but a
good night’s sleep is a rare luxury. Sleepless
nights and sleepy days is the natural state in
old age.
While not an iota of the body seems to be in
working order, unlike most good products, the
human body comes neither with a
manufacturer’s warranty, nor dia ܘ[K