Real Moms
RAISING MY CHILDREN IN
A FOREIGN COUNTRY
Two local moms talk about the
dynamics of moving from one
country to another while raising
children and having babies.
Go to www.thelittlepages.co.za/blog
to read the full interviews.
GRACE SANDERSON, 33
Grace is originally from Sunderland in
the UK. She met her husband, Greg
(who is from Port Elizabeth) while
they were both working as teachers in
London. The couple then travelled and
worked at an International School before
making the decision to relocate to South
Africa shortly after the birth of their first
child. They now have two children aged
three (Michael) and one (Georgina).
You had one birth in the UK and one in SA, how
did the experiences compare? People are often
surprised when I tell them that I had a much more
positive experience here in SA. In England, as most
women do, I used the NHS (National Health Service)
during my pregnancy and the birth. As the NHS is
a ‘free’ service (paid for through our tax) we only
have one or two scans and our check-ups are with
midwives rather than a gynaecologist. As most of
you will have experienced here in SA, you have
numerous scans and your gynaecologist will
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deliver your baby. My birth experience in the UK
was a lot more stressful and included three different
midwives and moving between three different
rooms. In the end, there was a rather panicked
delivery and I subsequently developed an infection.
I am not sure if it is because she was my second
child, but my daughter’s birth was a much calmer,
quicker and more joyful experience. My midwife
stayed with me throughout and my gynaecologist
was there to deliver her when the time arrived.
What has settling into a new country as well as
raising small children been like? Busy! We were
living in a one bedroom flat in London and I was
very keen to start a new chapter of our lives, in a
‘proper’ family home. I had visited PE a number of
times before making the decision to move here. I
think this really helped during the settling-in period.
Also, having a baby meant that I was able to meet
a lot of friends through baby classes and play
dates. I miss my family in the UK terribly, but we
are very fortunate to have my husband’s family here
in PE which has made the move so much easier.
What do you enjoy most about raising children
in Port Elizabeth? The outdoor lifestyle! Almost
every day we can spend time playing in the garden
The beaches, countryside and many child-friendly
cafes make it a wonderful place for young children.
I also find that South Africans are quite positive in
their outlook on life. This positivity is contagious
and I want my children to grow up with a ‘can-do’
attitude and joy of life. Sport also plays a major part
in schooling and creates a healthy lifestyle here.
What do you miss most about the UK? My family
and close friends. With the rand being so weak
against the pound, it is very hard for us to make
regular trips back to see everyone. I also miss the
safety, security and stability of the U.K. On a less
serious note, I also miss our shops, TV shows, online
shopping and low-cost travel.
BIANCA MATHE-REICHALT, 38
Bianca is originally from Zimbabwe and
her husband, Michael is German. The
couple met in Switzerland and their first
daughter (Zoe) was born there. The
family relocated to Port Elizabeth in
2012 and have since welcomed another
daughter (Mila) and a son (Thando).
What was the biggest difference between your
experience of having a baby in Switzerland
and here in SA? The biggest difference between
having children here and in Switzerland was the
period when I returned home with the baby. In
Switzerland, I had insurance covered home-visits
from the midwife. She came to check that I was
healing properly, the baby was feeding and growing
properly as well as that I was coping with the
demands of a new baby. All this happened before
my 6 week check up. There was constant monitoring
of the new mom and concerns were raised early
enough. In addition there was a support facility in
the city where one could go anytime at no additional
expense to consult on any concerns regarding the
development of the child as well as the challenges
for the parents. I found this to be absolutely helpful
as a young mother with no experience with babies.
Why did you decide to return to SA and raise
your family here? I get asked this question a lot.
The basic answer is that it made sense for us. We
had met in Europe and loved it there. We had great
jobs and really didn’t leave to escape something
bad. In addition, although we come from really
different backgrounds our values are the same and
we gel really well together so we did not really
intend for this sojourn to make us culturally closer
either. We did however think that it would add so
much value to our family and our relationship to
experience a bit of the African sun and hospitality
and we love new experiences as well as travelling.
Port Elizabeth made sense because it is close to
home (in my case), with a way of life that is familiar
to at least one of us. What do you enjoy most
about raising children in Port Elizabeth? The
best thing by far is really the friendly people. It is
no exaggeration that PE people are friendly. We
have made such great friendships. We like the fact
that as a blended family, we are always met with
friendly smiles and positive curiosity. Our children
have friends of all hues and we like the diversity of
our circle of friends. We however realise that people
are still shy to interact with people f rom different
backgrounds and race. We hope that more and
more people venture out of their comfort zones and
enrich their lives with more diversity.
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