The Link Winter 2019/2020 The Link Dec-Jan 2020 v3 | Page 21
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Gardening, anyone …. ??
A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife:
“Dear Keith, I have decided to plant some
lettuces in the back garden. When is the best
time to plant them?”
The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read
all mail, replied in a letter: “Dear Helen,
whatever you do, do not touch the back garden.
That is where I hid all the money.”
A week or so later, he received another letter
from his wife: “Dear Keith, you wouldn’t believe
what happened – some men came to the house
with shovels and dug up all of the back garden!”
The prisoner wrote another letter back: “Dear
Helen, now is the best time to plant the lettuces.”
The farmer & the tourist
The farmer whittled a stick as the tourist
approached him.
“How long to get to the nearest town, Joe,”
asked the tourist. The farmer continued to
whittle and started to whistle too.
“I said: how long to get to the nearest town,
Joe?” No reply, just whistle and whittle.
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“Gee Joe, I’ve been walkin’ all day. Couldn’t
you just tell me … aw heck … what’s the use!”
and the tourist walked away from the farm in
disgust.
He had gone about a hundred yards when the
farmer called him back. Exasperated the tourist
returned.
“It will take you about an hour.” said the farmer.
“Gee, thanks Joe. But why didn’t you tell me
that in the first place?”
“Had to see how fast you could walk first,” said
the farmer.
Blind date … !!
Two women met for a drink. “How was your
blind date?” asked the first woman.
“Terrible,” replied her friend, “he showed up in a
1932 Rolls-Royce.”
“What’s so terrible about that?” asked the first
woman.
“He was the original owner!”
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