my heart, Abdullah poured himself another drink of wine. "Care for another?" he asked offering
me my cup.
"No, I just want you to tell me more about Neeha."
Abdullah proceeded "I was in my twenties when Neeha was born. She was the daughter of
Fatima Dai."
Dai is the title for women in the villages who earn their living by singing at weddings, and births
of male children. These women live to entertain others. They make people laugh, children happy.
Lovers use them to deliver secret messages while elders delight in them. They are like minstrels.
They live on peoples' joys, though no one cares for theirs.
"At seventeen, when I became a man and first felt the stormy urge for sexual satisfaction, my
friend revealed another secret of Fatima. He told me about 'feeding time', when young men are
trained for sex.
"One day I stole five rupees, the fee for 'feeding', from grandmother's old box and walked to the
dark hut of Fatima. As I knocked on the door of her muddy, dirty room, my hand trembled.
"She came outside. There was a strange look on her face.
"'Is your mother okay?' she asked.
"'I'm not here for my mother. I have come...' I paused.
"'Don't be afraid,' she said. 'Tell me frankly why would you come here in this darkness?'
"'II'
"Fatima broke into startling laughter.
"'What is it you will do with me?' she laughed.
"I started to laugh as well. My fears melted away.
"'Yes Fati, I am here for feeding.' She grasped my hand and took me inside.
"'Where is my fee?' she asked immediately.
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