any expectations. I gigged a lot, I made a lot of friends and I challenged myself constantly. It is pertinent to mention that during this time I had a lot of support from my family who knew that if I could get out of my head for a moment, I’d probably be alright to re-direct the train onto the tracks. That undying faith in me was and has been the most special thing in my life
There were a lot of serendipitous moments that affirmed to me that I was pursuing my passion. I lived with a comedian – by chance – and he taught me that talking about my culture, specifically from the perspective I had always thought about it – was hugely important and would make me a better comedian. For that I will always be grateful because he was right
After some mild success in the open circuit in Scotland, I opened for ‘Scottish Comedian of the Year’ at the Adelaide Fringe. That was a generous and kind opportunity given to me by Daisy Earl who saw my potential and wanted to nurture it. Again, these serendipitous meetings hugely impacted my journey.
When I returned to Brisbane from just under two years’ travel and independence, I lost sense of myself and the black dog bit like it had never bitten before. I had a break-down that last about 9 months and I refused to do any comedy, fearing the judgement and critique too profusely.
I got medicated, I got therapy and I found creative outlets like writing and painting to focus my brain. Weirdly enough though, it was actually fishing that helped me most. If you’ve ever met me, you’ll know that I move, talk and think quickly and I can never just be still or quiet. But when fishing, that’s all you can do: practice patience, take in your surroundings and just stop for a moment.
I started gigging again and I found a new sense of purpose, drive and passion. Every gig I wanted to work on allowing myself to be more and more vulnerable on stage; I wanted to express the most authentic side of me. I wanted to open myself up to the audience and know that their judgement and critique could never truly hurt me because I was the only one who was really dishing it out. As soon as I learned to be myself on stage, audiences actually started to connect better, my material was sharper, my stage presence was brighter and my audience interaction was easier. And as I learned to open myself up on stage and find the strength in my vulnerability, so too did this become true in my personal life.
Comedy has allowed me to get in touch with my true self and learn and grow. Such is the power of allowing yourself to completely give your all to any creative pursuit. I am an artist, a creative, a comedian. And there’s no other me to be.Thanks to the guidance of my ‘Comedy Dads’ as I call them, I have been able to rub shoulders with some of my heroes and ask the guidance of some of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met.
If ever you get an opportunity, say ‘Why Not?!’ And if ever you feel unsure, break down the wall and find strength in your vulnerability. This is my comedy journey and I’m excited to see where it takes me next!