The Honey Bee Press October - December 2013

Page 6 Honey Bee Press short; it consisted entirely of people, not goals or dreams or possessions: my husband, my sons, my family, and friends. I realized that no matter how fulfilling a career is, it's temporary. But my relationships as a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend remain— and deserve more attention. I pray God will help me never to become more committed to temporary things than to the permanent relationships in my life. One day it occurred to me that I behaved as though I had to answer every call. So I started letting our answering machine take over when I didn't want to be interrupted. At first, I felt guilty about ignoring calls, but it so completely diffused my stress that I soon forgot about my guilt. Along the way I've learned other ways to create emotional space: a brief walk or a few moments of solitude behind a closed door. Talk show host Oprah Winfrey encourages viewers to create emotional space by keeping a gratitude journal in which they list five things they're thankful for every day. These simple actions promote a shift in attitude that keeps troubles in perspective so they don't affect me negatively. By creating material and physical space, I automatically created more emotional space, but I knew that to keep that space intact, I needed to take more deliberate steps. In his book Margin, Dr. Richard Swenson recommends planning pauses into each day. He suggests doing things that force you to slow down, such as choosing the longest line at the bank or grocery store instead of the shortest. This has been the hardest habit to develop! I seem driven to find the shortest line and feel stress building when another line moves faster than the one I'm in. Forcing myself to step into the longest line and relax still requires great effort—but I'm learning. Finally, I knew I needed to declutter my spiritual life. Much of my time is devoted to "spiritual things"; I speak to Christian groups, write for Christian publications, work in women's ministry, and serve with an international missions organization. But as important as all this Christian stuff is, it becomes sin if it crowds my relationship with God. I must never allow anything to interfere with that. Another way I've created emotional space is by taming the stress promoters in my day. Since we operate a business from our home and the telephone rings incessantly, my greatest source of stress was the telephone. My stomach always coiled in a knot from the constant interruption of this necessary evil. I can only maintain that all-important relationship by spending a significant amount of time alone with God each day. If I don't build space into my days to allow my relationship with God to mature, I'll never be able to maintain a healthy amount of physical and emotional space. It's been two years since I first began decluttering my life. It hasn't come easily; it cuts against the grain of my natural desires. When a store advertises a huge sale, I still find myself getting in my car—even though I don't need anything. An invitation arrives in the mail that I long to accept—even though it will steal time from my family. My struggle to maintain physical, emotional, and spiritual space is ongoing, but the rewards of my perseverance are as enticing as that giant food buffet we encountered on vacation: a serenity, order, and satisfying sense of God's approval. It's impossible to accumulate too much of that kind of stuff. Copyright © 2007, Mayo Mathers and Christianity Today / ChristianBibleStudies.com. Used with permission. Image courtesy of sattva / FreeDigitalPhotos.net I, Too, Have a Dream— by Tamara Dean Like the late Martin Luther King Jr. I too have a dream and although mine was not birthed out of racial inequality, it was birthed out of the same heart of solidarity. MLK said, “ for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. And they have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.” Dear sisters, it’s time for us to realize that our destiny’s are indeed “inextricably bound ,” meaning incapable of being disentangled. Just like you can’t escape from your own presence you can’t get away from me. We are one body in Christ in need of each other; or as the great apostle Paul so eloquently writes in Ephesians 4:16 NLT- From him the whole body grows, fitted and held together through every supporting ligament. As each one does its part, the body grows in love. Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net You matter! Always have and always will. Your part affects my part. I need you to be your best so that I can be my best. So… I, too, have a dream: For women to realize that real beauty shines out from within and as singer/songwriter India Arie wrote, My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes. You are who you are because of whose you are. It will never be in the clothes that you wear, the car that you drive, the house that you live in or the man you are with or not with. You are who you are because God loves you. help lift up another sister. I, too, have a dream: That we transform our mind into believing that we really can do ALL things through Christ which strengthen us. We are limitless beings! Our deepest dreams can come true no matter how lofty they may be. I, too, have a dream: That women can unashamedly pray together, struggle together, admit their faults and cry together. Forgive one another and move forward for the sake of the mission. I, too, have a dream: That women would stop the hate, the envy, and the fear of not measuring up so instead she tears down her sister in an attempt to build her own confidence. I, too, have a dream: that we will break free from the chains of people pleasing, pride, and jealousy and live the victorious life, together, as we shout, together, free to be…, free to be…, thank God almighty we are free to be… I, too, have a dream: That as women rise to the mountain top of success, they will not be afraid of being robbed of their shine as they We cannot walk alone-Martin Luther King Jr. Visit Tamara Dean’s website: www.prayhers.com

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