Healthy
T
here are multiple
theories on personality,
development, and how
to address problems
that we encounter in life. Professional
and personal experience has taught me
that there are some situations where
the best answer in changing behavior
is to simply STOP. The other word for
it is one that’s missing from today’s
vernacular: self-control.
Are there areas in your life that
need self-control? Are there areas
where the first step in change lies
in “stopping the behavior,” even
just once?
I know of which I speak. There
have been areas in my life that have
been out of balance. I’ve struggled with
addictive behaviors. As I have worked
through each one, from distorted
thinking to anger, there comes a point
where you have to ask yourself, “If I
want to get over this, what behavior do
I need to stop?” Then you need to take
the first step and stop the behavior.
Hearts
?Healthy
Homes
by Brenda Yoder, MA,
Education & Prevention Advocate for Elijah Haven Crisis Intervention Center
It’s as difficult and simple as that.
Changing behavior is not easy. For
years I struggled with an eating disorder. For years I responded in anger. For
years I believed the self-loathing lies
that lived in my head. For years I allowed other people’s approval to define
me. For each of these, I needed to stop
the behavior and exercise self-control.
I needed to end the cycle of addictive behavior. I needed to stop blaming
other people. I needed to stop looking
at my insecurities and weaknesses. I
needed to stop living in fear of what
others thought of me.
There’s a moment for each of us,
where we have to ask ourselves, “What
will I do? I can’t change the other
person or their response to the situation. Will I continue in my behavior or
change what only I can change?
There’s a moment for each of us
where we become aware of what is
right and wrong in a situation. The
line drawn is different for each of us.
In each instance, it’s a moment where
we realize how we’ve been functioning isn’t working for us (as Dr.
Phil would say).
We need to exert self-control in
the situation and stop the behavior
that’s damaging. Then we need to seek
to replace that behavior with healthier
choices. The only person we can ever
change is our-self. The only behavior
we can ever change is ours. The only
person we can ever stop is us.
Are there areas in your life where
you need to stop unhealthy behavior
or thinking? It’s never comfortable
or easy. Sometimes the first step
to victorious and healthy living is
to simply stop (one time, a second
time, and a third and more) until the
behavior diminishes.
Are you ready to do that? You
won’t be able to do it in thirty-minutes,
or even a week. It will take a while to
change the behavior because it took a
while for the behavior to become unhealthy. But trying it just once is worth
a shot. Will you join me?
The Hometown Treasure · July ‘13 · pg 9