S PRING 2017
P AGE 11
Losing My Senses
Coping with the effects of hearing loss
Trinity O’Connor ‘20
Contributor
In May of my fourth-grade-year,
I came home from school and
told my mom that I had gone to
the nurse because I felt dizzy and
my ear was bothering me. She
took me to the pediatrician who
said I had fluid in my ear, that it
was not an infection, and there
was really nothing to worry
about. I was given steroids for
the inflammation, and the fluid
was supposed to be gone within
a few weeks.
The fluid did not go away as
quickly as expected, and when it
did, the hearing in my left ear
went too. I was sent to a special-
ist at Massachusetts Eye and Ear
to have to have testing done. My
mother and I were told that I had
gotten a virus called acute laby-
rinthitis, and it had left me with
permanent hearing loss. There
was only about 10 percent hear-
ing left in one ear, which meant I
was practically deaf in my left
ear.
I remember my mother asking
the specialist what to do next
and if it could be reversed or
fixed, but the specialist said that
there was nothing to be done,
and that he was sorry.
We got a second opinion at a
different Boston hospital, but the
terrifying results were the same.
I did not realize at the time the
impact it would have on my life.
At first, I tried to go on as if
nothing had changed, but as time
went on, life got harder. I had
trouble hearing what was going
on in the classroom, and I was
afraid of missing homework
assignments.
In addition to being anxious in
school, social events scared me
because I often could not hear
who I was with. Even something
as simple as carpooling to school
with my friend changed, and I
found myself having to position
myself to where I could hear
her. Being aware of my position-
ing is something I had to be
aware of, making sure I was
sitting on the left side of my
friends if I wanted to talk to
them. The everyday effects of
my hearing loss became some-
thing I was very conscious of
both inside and outside of
school. Even playing basketball
was harder; I couldn’t hear the
coach calling plays or my team-
mates trying to communicate
with me on the court.
Because of all this, I became
extremely nervous, and even at
times embarrassed. On the
court, referees would be telling
me I was stepping out of bounds,
or that I was about to make a
penalty towards the other team,
but I couldn’t hear any of it.
Many times, I had to explain to
people that I was not ignoring
them, I just could not hear them.
Sometimes people thought I did
not like them, or that I was an-
gry with them, but the truth was
that when it came to the point of
having to explain myself, I be-
came embarrassed or very agitat-
ed with my disability. So, I often
felt isolated.
By the age of 12, I had learned to
read lips, but in settings where
there were a lot of people, it
would be extremely hard to have
a conversation. As a result, I
hated going to the South Shore
Plaza, because there would be so
many people there. There were
so many noises and things going
on around me, and I could not
read people's lips as well as I
could in a one-on-one conversa-
tion. So instead of attempting to
move so I could hear them, or
ask who I was with to repeat what
they said over and over, I would
just stay quiet, or even push to
leave because I felt like I would
be too annoying.
By eighth-grade, these emotions
of oblivion and isolation began to
swell and build up inside of me. I
became depressed, and my anxie-
ty became almost unbearable. I
dreaded getting up in the morn-
ing, and I often did not. I had
panic attacks anytime I would
even see the Frolio Middle
School, and I was not even sure
what I was afraid of.
Now, in high school, even though
I am not perfectly coping with my
hearing loss, my faith constantly
helps me. I find extreme comfort
in knowing that God has my back.
I also find that if I try my best to
fix my problems but cannot, ask-
ing others for help is not a bad
thing. I have learned that regard-
less of what troubles come a per-
son's way, if they reach out there
will be a solution. A lot of the
time the answers to problems will
not be easy to reach. But, I can
begin by asking for help from
people who care.
At Abington High, there are some
wonderful people that are more
than willing to help. Guidance
Counselors Ms. Ferioli, Ms.
Sweeney and Ms. McGinness, as
well as our school psychologist
Ms. Posk, all are available to talk
and listen to any problems that
anyone may have. The teachers
are also always accessible to chat
with any time. There are so many
people willing to help high school
students, and asking for help is
never something anyone should
see as a bad thing.
Sound Wave by Louis Lima (Share-a-like
license via Wikimedia Commons)
“I became
depressed, and
my anxiety
became almost
unbearable. I
dreaded
getting up in
the morning,
and I often did
not.”
Trinity
O’Connor ‘20