The Grapevine Winter 2019/2020 Grapevine Dec-Jan 2029 v3 | Page 30

Gardening, anyone …. ?? A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife: “Dear Keith, I have decided to plant some lettuces in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?” The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a letter: “Dear Helen, whatever you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where I hid all the money.” A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife: “Dear Keith, you wouldn’t believe what happened – some men came to the house with shovels and dug up all of the back garden!” The prisoner wrote another letter back: “Dear Helen, now is the best time to plant the lettuces.” Trailers Trailer Parts & Accessories Towbars supplied and fitted Yuasa Car & Leisure Batteries Number Plates While-U-Wait Roof Boxes Cycle Carriers and more Please see our website www.leisure-mart.co.uk for our full range of products tel: 01386 555020 [email protected] Please visit our Showroom at: Units 1-4 Woodcote House Racecourse Road • Pershore • WR10 2EY The farmer & the tourist The farmer whittled a stick as the tourist approached him. Proud Winners of Ultraframe Conservatories Installation of the Month “How long to get to the nearest town, Joe,” asked the tourist. The farmer continued to whittle and started to whistle too. “I said: how long to get to the nearest town, Joe?” No reply, just whistle and whittle. “Gee Joe, I’ve been walkin’ all day. Couldn’t you just tell me … aw heck … what’s the use!” and the tourist walked away from the farm in disgust. A complete range of stunning Glazed Extensions and Conservatories Celebrati n 36 yea g in busin rs ess BESPOKE WINDOWS AND DOORS | AUTHORISED RETAIL PARTNER He had gone about a hundred yards when the farmer called him back. Exasperated the tourist returned. “It will take you about an hour.” said the farmer. “Gee, thanks Joe. But why didn’t you tell me that in the first place?” “Had to see how fast you could walk first,” said the farmer. 30 7INDOWS s $OORS s #ONSERVATORIES s 'LAZED %XTENSIONS Glassier Exhibition Centres 7ORCESTER 2D s $RAKES "ROUGHTON s 0ERSHORE 7ORCESTERSHIRE 72 !' s 4EL   7ORCESTER 2D s 5PTON 7ARREN s "ROMSGROVE 7ORCESTERSHIRE " %5 s 4EL   % INFO GLASSIERCOUK s WWWGLASSIERCOUK Monday - Friday AM TO PM 3ATURDAY AM TO PM 3UNDAY 5PTON 7ARREN ONLY AM TO PM To advertise call 01684 833715 or email: [email protected]