her temperature. I let the devil convince me her condition was my fault and realized I was letting my past rob me of my joy by carrying that guilt. An astonishing shift took place when I realized everything I had gone through and drug my three kids through had left them strong, independent and resilient, armored to face life. There is positive in every negative if we allow the shift in our minds to take place. Although we experience failure along our journey, we can turn them into success stories.
I have continued to step into my purpose of sharing my story as an Ambassador of Transparency to provide the raw truth to help others come to terms with theirs. My mission is to lead others to self-forgiveness, self-love and self-happiness by releasing their inner demons through transparency and the C.O.P.E. = HOPE method. In pursuing my mission, I entered The Next Impactor competition to become a fierce global impactor vying for a 500k prize package of tools to catapult my message world- wide. Of course my competitive nature had me doing as much as I could to draw attention to my progress, out score the other competitors and WIN, WIN, WIN… I wanted so badly to have a unique video which would stand me apart from the others. I wanted it perfect and procrastinated on making the video until I felt I had the perfect script. My perfectionism was rearing its ugly head again in my life after I thought I had finally rid myself from it and the pressure it creates. I found myself on vetting night confident I would make the top 50 as I thought I had gone above and beyond moving through the ranks out voting others, posting a lengthy video with uniqueness, and gaining approval from my peers. My story of overcoming my worst to live my best was made into the book, What Goes Up, and its’ recent release was supplying feedback of how I was already impacting lives. I had positioned myself on top, and settled in ready to reap the reward of getting a top 50 spot to move forward in the competition.
Sadly, as my name hadn’t been called by slots 45, 46 and 47, I began doubting my success and became extremely anxious to hear my name called. Surely I was going to make the top 50, after all, I felt I had met my expectations to set myself apart and shine as an impactor. After names 48, 49, then 50 were called, my name was nowhere on the leaderboard and I had failed. Wrapped up in perfectionism, I was left stargazing instead of trailblazing toward my mission. I immediately went back to feeling insecure, ashamed, angry and inferior. Somehow, despite all my honest efforts, , I didn’t measure up and wasn’t good enough. By default, I equated