husband at a young age is another one. My struggle was how to live. When you get prepared for something, you have plans. And then suddenly, one day the plans are destroyed and you don't know how to live because everything what you have done was prepared for another kind of life and then you wake up and it dawns on you that life does not exist anymore.
My children were my main motivation. You know how it is when you know that you have to do
something but you don't know how, and you have only the belief that you'll able to do it. I think my first struggle was deciding what I would do and what I would not do. First of all, my husband’s body was found after 20 days. For 20 days I did not know what was going on. He was very powerful for me, he was like a god to me and I loved him a lot. So I couldn't even think of the possibility of him not being alive. I
thought maybe there was a problem somewhere but his death was the last thing on my mind. So,
for 20 days I was waiting for him, and when his body was found, you know, it's like no, like you lose your ground for a second. But I was grown up. I started my experience at three years old. So I had to decide what I would do. It was one of the evenings. I had a very pure and calm mind and I sat and took a piece of paper and wrote principles that I would follow. I practiced these principles for four years, maybe even seven years. And they helped me to survive emotionally.
You know the traumas that come with widowhood. There was even a time when I thought of a suicide. But I was responsible for my children, I loved them immensely. That kept me alive.
Q - What’s the biggest factor that has helped you to be successful?
A - I think my strength is that I was taught to never give up. I’m kind of joking! Success is about moving forward, there really is no other way. When everything is going well and circumstances are under our control, it’s easier to live and follow our dreams. However, sometimes things are different, when we may fail at something and get upset. In this situation, we tend to operate with less enthusiasm, and sometimes even come to a complete stop. In a worse case scenario, the demotivation is such that we surrender and actually start moving backwards. I don’t live like this; my “narrative” does not include stopping or moving backwards. Even if it’s just crawling I have to move forward.
In my practice, which includes psychotherapy and coaching, I use movie therapy. I ask my clients to watch movies not as entertainment but rather as an analytical approach which explores
causal situations in the lives of the characters.