The Gentleman Magazine Issue 15 | June 2019 | Page 85

But suddenly, amongst the shadows, something shone. I
realised that taking risks helps us connect to our potential. Risk
helps us grow; helps set us off on the right path to find our
dreams.
Taking a risk is like a moment in time that is captured; when all
the power of the stars became a part of us, part of our energy
and enables us to perform our very own mini-miracles!
If we don’t take risks, we don’t live! I knew then I didn’t want to
go back; but I didn’t want to go forward without risks.
I want to close the door to the ‘risk averse Elinor’; the one who
cared more about what people thought than what I did!
I have learnt to park the dire and dramatic worst-case scenario
images in my minds-eye. To stop focusing on what might go
wrong – what I might lose or sacrifice – and instead think
about what might go right!
Now! I should point out that I am not suggesting you play
chicken, that you risk your mortgage payment on the horses or
take a year off work because you feel like it! I’m suggesting we
all look at risk differently, that we overcome our tendency to be
safe and understand that some risks are worth taking!
I learnt that in one moment, everything could change. But I
also learnt that in any one moment we have the ability to change
anything that makes us unhappy; and we should, because life
is sadly, far too short.
I try to pay attention to every magical moment, to really see the
world around me.
Now, because of my personal experiences, sometimes it was
hard for me to take risks. I didn’t want to do anything that
could push the sails too far, anything that could take another
‘baby’ away from my family, especially my parents. So, for a
few years I played it really safe; being acutely aware of risk. You
might say during that time I was ‘innately risk averse‘; afraid
to fail and let people down, afraid of putting my vulnerability
on the line. Afraid that a risk could lead to a catastrophic loss.
Until one day, one day something happened and I realised..!
Remember those pictures in the 90’s, the ones you stared at;
the ‘magic eye’ pictures. When after some insanely interesting
eye crossing, suddenly, you saw the 3D image emerge from the
colourful mess of blobs!
Like with those pictures, I don’t know how, but I just suddenly
saw things clearly.
Things I needed to see in order for me to breathe freely and cut
the chains holding me back from living life with freedom and
adventure; bravery and curiosity.
It suddenly all came together. And honestly it was probably
about time! It had been so easy to settle for the stratus quo.
To keep my mouth closed and not risk having an opinion. Not
taking the chance for a change. Not being passionate about
things in case others disagreed. Not saying yes to adventure in
case it cost other people pain. Not risking being happy in case
that meant someone else wasn’t!
I have a theory that I now stick to when I face any ‘risk’, I ask
myself three questions:
•
What would I do if I was a braver, bolder, more
curious me?
•
If the ‘me’ in 5 years time was able to talk to the ‘me’
today, what would I say if I did nothing?
•
Why am I scared?
Interestingly the ‘why and I scared’ question has only a few
answers. Normal it’s “I don’t know!“; often it’s “In case I get
hurt!” followed by “What if I fail, if i’m no good, if I don’t bring
value or happiness!”
I have learnt to take notice of my answers. The ‘banter’ I have
with myself is hilarious at times; like something from SPLIT!
But at least by me having this conversation with myself, I know
that I am working on making my tomorrow better than my
today.
There will always be risks. But I know now that my auto-drive
is to steer more towards understanding that the fallout of
taking that risk wont be as bad as I think; and that I mustn’t
underestimate my ability to handle the consequences!
I may be living my life for two; I may be scared at times; but
I know that I, like you, are more than capable of dealing with
the fallout. And what we forget, you and I, is that we are worth
‘happy’; we deserve happy!
So, here’s to only regretting the things we do; not the things we
didn’t do. To fearing the regret, more than fearing the failure.
And to knowing, with 100 million percent of all that we are;
that we can take the risk, we can live the life we have been
gifted and we can be happy in our own mini-miracle we call
our today!
The Gentleman Magazine | 85