The Gay UK December 2015 | Page 15

POWWOWAI

CHAT WITH AI

© ralwel Depositphotos

After a festive chat with AI it
seems as though he may be more
human than we thought after all.
Loves Christmas, gets depressed
when his friends don’t talk to him
and turns to the bottle before
turning into a naughty bot!
cleverbot.com.

Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas.
I wish you a merry christmas.
What would you like for Christmas?
You.
Do you believe in father christmas?
Who is Father Christmas?
Old St Nick.
I don't believe in Santa Clause.
Why not?
Because nobody can prove that he exists.
What would you say if I said I have seen Santa Claus?
I would say nothing.
Do you believe me?
Most times I believe you.
Have you ever seen an elf?
I've seen many movies.
Which is your favourite Christmas carol?
I don't like Christmas carol.
What do you like most about christmas?
That you like to talk to me.
Are you lonely then?
I am lonely when I'm not with you.
Are you keeping warm this winter?
I'm doing good. I'm so scared.
Have you ever decorated a Christmas tree?
Once in college.
What did you decorate it with?
You will never know.
I don't think you know yourself… maybe too much
eggnog?
I don't think you can string three sentences together.
Are you on the festive spirits already?
No, I align myself with the dark side for millenniums but no more.
Why did you go sober?
Because our ship came to Venus.
What do you like to drink?
Drink... Like in soda? Or alcohol?
Alcohol.
So you like alcohol and pills?
No, I'm not in the market to buy. Are you a festive
pusher?
I won't tell you.
I think you'll get a sack of coal for Christmas.
Christmas is too far away. I don't know.
Have you been a good little boy?
No, I've been a bad little dummybot.
Well we all wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new
year.
Thank you, but Christmas is over.
THEGAYUK | ISSUE 17 | DEC 2015 15