Articles
Happy Movember - Video Game’s Best Moustaches
Chop Chop
Master Onion
The result of an experiment
which crossed the DNA of
Mister Miyagi and a overlysized French onion, Chop Chop
Master Onion is best known
for training 2D rapping dogs.
With his clichéd oriental sensei
pencil moustache, stink lines
and hordes of onion minions,
it’s difficult to believe how
bizarre Sony’s first party games
were. Kick, Kick, Punch!
Sully
While on the topic of Sony’s
first party characters, Sully
couldn’t be further from the
anthropomorphised onion.
The quintessential old school
treasure hunter, Victor Sullivan,
is of course rarely seen without
Issue 62 • December 2014
his trademark cigar and ‘been
there done that’ attitude. But
what makes him a likeable
character? That would be
the matching silver hair and
moustache. Oh, and he can fly a
plane, but he’s got a moustache
so… obviously he can!
Captain Price
‘How’d a muppet like you pass
selection?’ The first words of a
genre redefining game spoken
by possibly the manliest man
to ever be made of pixels. The
grizzled SAS veteran takes
no nonsense, and neither
would you if you had seen the
stuff him and his face fungus
have seen. It’s facial hair that
says ‘yes I’ve killed people,
but I also offer a soft and
warming edition to the face’.
Doctor Eggman
If your body was the shape
of an egg, your legs were
extremely thin and you had
freakishly large feet how would
you draw attention away
from yourself? You’d probably
terrorise a trainer-wearing blue
hedgehog or you’d grow an
oversized comical moustache.
Or in the case of morbidly
obese Doctor Eggman you’d
do both. The mad scientist,
who boasts an IQ of 300, is
probably best known for his
end-of-level inventions and the
idiotic need to display his weak
spot. This month however, we
offer him a round of applause
and some appreciation for
the bushy moustache that
goes wider than his overlysized egg-shaped body.
9 • GameOn Magazine