The Coshocton County Beacon September 15, 2022 | Page 20

20 • The Beacon September 15 , 2022

Think about your bucket lists and important letters to write

Do you have a bucket list ? A compilation of those things you hope to accomplish during your time on earth ? Some experts say this is a good thing to create .
Stanford University ’ s School of Medicine researched this topic with over 3,000 people . This all stemmed from a theory that doctors and nurses should routinely inquire about their patients ’ bucket lists and discuss the impact of their medical treatments on their life goals . Stanford calls this providing preference-sensitive care . Their research found

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over 90 % of the respondents had a bucket list . I find this surprising , but maybe it is true . Even if we don ’ t each have a list written down and posted somewhere , when asked , would most people say there are at least a handful of things they hope to do or see before they die ?
Participants who reported faith , religion and spirituality were
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800.552.7150 important to them were most likely to have a bucket list compared with those who reported it to be unimportant . In the survey each respondent could list up to five different things . When all the responses were tallied , the researchers found six different themes :
— Desire to travel ( 78.5 % of participants ).
— Desire to accomplish a personal goal ( 78.3 %).
— Desire to achieve specific life milestones ( 51 %).
— Desire to spend quality time with friends and family ( 16.7 %).
— Desire to achieve financial stability ( 16.1 %).
— Desire to do a daring activity ( 15 %).
T h e S t a n f o r d researchers suggest sharing your bucket list
with those closest to you for a few good reasons . Sometimes the bucket list items involve other people either directly or indirectly . It also can be very helpful to share your list with your doctor . Often there is a health-related goal on the list , and doctors could be an ally and resource to help you .
I appreciate Stanford takes this another step beyond the bucket list . They also have resources to walk you through a What Matters letter and a Life Review letter . These are the things people very rarely take the time to think through and express in writing . These letter templates can be found at med . stanford . edu / letter .
The What Matters letter is for your doctor about what matters most
to you at the end of your life . This is a template with guided questions about important future milestones , how medical decisions are made , how your family handles bad news and other important information you want your doctor to know .
The second letter is for friends and family . This uses the seven tasks of life review . These tasks include things like acknowledging the important people in your life , remembering treasured moments from your life , apologizing to those you love if you hurt them and forgiving those who love you if they have hurt you . This can be written by someone who is ill but should especially be considered by anyone who is well .
There are times I have imagined writing a letter to each of my children and my husband — things I would want them to know and to remind them just how much I love them . But I will admit I have not acted on it yet . There also are times I yearn for a letter from my mom . I still get teary-eyed nearly 14 years after her passing when her friends reassure me of how proud she was and how much she loved my brother and me . Oh , to have that written in her own handwriting .
Take some time this week to check out these letter templates . For you and your family , it will be time well spent .
Emily Marrison is an OSU Extension family and consumer sciences educator and may be called at 740-622-2265 .
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