The Coshocton County Beacon June 3, 2020 | Page 18
18 • The Beacon June 3, 2020
BF-00481345
1199 S 2nd Street, Coshocton, OH 43812
740-622-4470
Contract provider for Mental Health & Recovery Services
Teens and screens: What
parents need to know
Emily
Marrison
Columnist
A couple of weeks ago
I was able to take part in a
virtual reunion for a group
I spent time with while we
were teenagers 25 years ago.
As we reminisced, interwoven
in our conversation
were comments about how
different our use of technology
was then. We wrote letters
to one another instead
of sending emails. We made
very short long-distance
calls rather than texting. We
even took photos on a camera
with film that had to be
developed.
To say teenagers are
growing up in a completely
different world than we did
is certainly an understatement.
I can hardly believe
that in 10 short days I will
become the parent of a teenager.
I heard once long ago
that as parents we are trying
hard to work ourselves out
of a job. We want to raise
young people who can not
only function on their own,
but also make good and wise
choices and be of benefit to
others and society. Therefore
it must be about more
than rules when it comes to
screens and our teens. Here
are some considerations for
parents.
Cyberbullying: Bullying
is a tale as old as time,
but technology allows for
increased opportunities to
harass others without limitations
of time and space.
This often leads to silent
and continued suffering for
some teens. One of the best
resources I have found on
this topic is from the Cyberbullying
Research Center.
This is co-directed by two
professors of criminal justice
from the University
of Wisconsin and Florida
Atlantic University.
They define cyberbullying
as “willful and repeated
harm inflicted through
the use of computers, cell
phones and other electronic
devices. This includes incidents
where adolescents
use technology to harass,
threaten, humiliate or otherwise
hassle their peers.”
According to their research,
37% of students have experienced
cyberbullying in
their lifetimes.
The website at www.
cyberbullying.org has
resources available for educators,
parents, youth and
adult victims. This is a quality
site that is research-based
and includes fact sheets on
digital dating abuse, teen
sexting, standing up to
cyberbullying and more.
Online predators: A
2015 University of Phoenix
study explored teachers’ and
counselors’ perceptions of
preventing sexual assault
from online predators. They
identified five themes that
contribute to this problem
including lack of parental
supervision, social networking
websites and chat
rooms, teenagers need for
relationships, instant gratification
among teenagers, and
lack of education for parents.
A Cornell University
study from 2013 showed
many parents were underestimating
risky online behavior
of their children.
One resource I find particularly
interesting is an
“Internet Use Contract”
from the CRC. One side lists
expectations for the child,
and the other side lists parent
expectations. This sets
the stage for some great discussions
about boundaries.
Having “parental controls”
turned on is not the same as
having conversations with
your tweens and teens about
expectations while online.
Know the lingo: I
laughed at a T-shirt I saw
the other day that said, “No
one prepares you for the
transition from Ma-ma, to
Mommy, to Mom, to Bruh.”
Teens have always had their
own language. One way to
decode or to better understand
abbreviations and
acronyms is through the
Digital Glossary at www.
commonsense.org. This
page also describes the latest
digital apps. It can help
you understand vamping
and doxing, the difference
between TikTok and Yik
Yak, YOLO, FOMO, PAP
and POS. The CRC site also
has an excellent glossary
with social media, cyberbullying
and online safety
terms to know.
All in all the worst thing
we can do as parents is hand
our kids a tablet, phone or
laptop and just hope they
will be safe. We wouldn’t
say, “Here’s a bike. Ride it
whenever you want, however
you want, any time you
want.” The most important
thing we can do is talk with
our tweens and teens about
the good and the bad and set
clear expectations. Adolescents
don’t think about the
future or consequences the
same way adults do. That
is why they have us in their
lives. It is both a great privilege
and challenge to be in
this interdependent coaching
phase of parenting a teen.
Emily Marrison is an
OSU Extension family and
consumer sciences educator
and may be called at 740-
622-2265.
Call 740-622-4237 for more info.
Wish her a
Happy Birthday
with a
Warm Fuzzy
ad in
The Beacon!