August 3 , 2023 The Beacon • 23
Elder mediation can help families navigate caregiving
Dear Savvy Senior ,
Are there any services you recommend that can help families resolve elder parent caregiving conflicts ? My 86-year-old father was recently diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer ’ s disease , and to make matters worse , my sister and brother and I have been perpetually arguing about how to handle his future caregiving and financial needs . Conflicted Siblings Dear Conflicted , It ’ s not unusual when adult children disagree with each other regarding the care of an elder parent . If you and your siblings are willing , a good possible solution is to hire an eldercare mediator who can help you work through your disagreements peacefully . Here ’ s how it works .
Elder mediation
While mediators have been used for years to help divorcing couples sort out legal and financial disagreements and avoid court battles , eldercare mediation is a relatively new and specialized service designed to help families resolve disputes that are related to aging parents or other elderly relatives .
Family disagreements over an ill or elderly parent ’ s caregiving needs , medical care , living arrangements , driving issues , and legal and financial decisions are just some of the many issues that an eldercare mediator can help with . But don ’ t confuse this with family or group therapy . Mediation is only about decisionmaking , not feelings and emotions .
The job of an elder mediator is to step in as a neutral third party to help ease family tensions , listen to everyone ’ s concerns , hash out disagreements and misunderstandings , and help your family make decisions that are acceptable to everyone .
Good mediators also can assist your family in identifying experts such as estate planners , geriatric care managers , or healthcare or financial professionals who can supply important information for family decisionmaking .
Your family also needs to know the mediation process is completely confidential and can take anywhere from a few hours to several meetings depending on the complexity of your issues . And if some family members live far away , a conference or video call can be used to bring everyone together .
MVNU students are on dean ’ s list
Mount Vernon Nazarene University presented more than 540 students with the achievement of being named to the dean ’ s list for the spring semester .
Students receive this designation by earning a GPA of 3.5 or above . Of the 546 students named this year , 197 students earned a 4.0 GPA , with 349 students earning a GPA between 3.5 and 3.9 .
The following are those who made the list from
Coshocton County : — Coshocton : Kenzie
Potter . — Walhonding : Ashley
Mast and Megan Peck . — Wa r s a w : M a c e y
Geog and Allison Prouty .
If you ’ re interested in hiring a private eldercare mediator , you can expect to pay anywhere from $ 100 to more than $ 500 per hour , depending on where you live and who you choose . Or if available in your area , you may be able to get help through a community-based nonprofit program that offers free or low-cost services by volunteer mediators . we ’ re hiring
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Finding a mediator
To locate an elder mediator in your area , start by asking for referrals from health professionals or hospital social workers or search online at The Academy of Professional Family Mediators website at www . apfmnet . org or www . Mediate . com . Both sites have searchable directories .
Or to search for free / low-cost community-based
mediation programs in your state , see the National Association for Community Mediation website at www . nafcm . org . Unfortunately , not all states offer them .
There is currently no universally accepted credential or professional standard for eldercare mediators , so make sure the person you choose has extensive experience with elder issues that are similar to what your family is dealing with . Also , be sure you ask for references and check them . Most elder mediators are attorneys , social workers , counselors or other professionals who are trained in mediation and conflict resolution .
Send your senior questions to Savvy Senior , P . O . Box 5443 , Norman , OK 73070 , or visit www . Savvy- Senior . org .
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