5 . Naysayers : If you haven ’ t already encountered someone negative who wants to burst your bubble , you definitely will . The farther you travel on your dance journey , especially if you have set high goals , strive to attain them , think outside the box and take risks in order to be unique , the louder and more aggressive the naysayers will become . They ridicule you either directly or behind your back . They make you feel bad and try to undermine your confidence . You can try to argue with them , but it doesn ’ t really change anything . You try to be nice to them , and they only find you weak . They don ’ t agree that your dreams are worth the effort . Or perhaps they are jealous of you and can ’ t bear to see you achieve something that they don ’ t have the courage to try or the talent to accomplish . No matter how hard it is to ignore them , the best thing you can do is say nothing and move on . You do not need their approval . You must honor your own authenticity , which has nothing to do with anyone else ’ s authenticity . Take the high road , even if it appears to be a lonely one . In the end you will be happy that you did what is right for you .
Maybe these guidelines seem like lofty ideas , so I will offer you some examples from my own personal journey that prove that they work .
• Trust your gut : My gut always felt that I had something special to offer oriental dance . I began dancing at 3 years old , and learned that ballet was not going to provide a career for me . At 18 I explored oriental dance , and knew right from the start that this is where I belonged . This same gut instinct told me when to attempt my first night club gig , when to accept my first teaching position , when to travel to Egypt , and when to latch onto my mentor , Ibrahim Farrah .
• Thinking outside the box and setting goals with dates : I stepped into oriental dance knowing that my family would not approve . They were amused , but did not believe that dance could ever be a serious career . I studied the dance and performed part time for quite a while , but deep inside I promised myself that I would become a full time dancer someday . So I set a goal for myself that had a date on it . I met that goal exactly . I was also thinking outside the box when I traveled all over the world to work with my mentor .
Another goal was to explore various Middle Eastern countries to see firsthand what the dance was , rather than being content with whatever I saw in the U . S . I was thinking outside the box when I opened my first dance studio in the 1990 ’ s , well before the new millennia made belly dance the latest craze .
• Taking risks : It was a scary risk when I decided to take that leap of faith and leave my job , with all its benefits , in order to dance full time . I took another big risk when I was offered a job to teach for six months in an oriental dance school in Vienna , Austria , in 1993 . I left the security of my home to live in a different country where I had never been before , did not speak the language , and did not know how very different it was to live in Europe . It turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made and presented performance and teaching experiences that I would never have acquired if I had stayed in the U . S .
• Naysayers : Family members were my initial naysayers , but once they saw my success as a dancer , they came around and are now my biggest supporters . Other naysayers included Middle Eastern people who claim that only people born in the Middle East can ever perform oriental dance with the right ‘ feeling ’. What fun it was to see them surprised when I was invited to perform with Nagua Fouad . Other naysayers included a variety of ambitious students who studied with me for years only to eventually part ways , some quite notoriously aggressive , some passively aggressive . Can ’ t say I have heard much about their dance career afterwards . Instead , I focused on my goals and stayed out of the way of anyone who tried to derail me . You have to believe in yourself and be committed to your dreams !
Lastly , I want to share with you a recent experience that followed all of these guidelines and brought me a new success . After dancing and teaching for nearly 40 years , my gut encouraged me to think outside the box once again . When 2016 began , I decided to challenge myself physically and mentally by setting a goal of participating in a bodybuilding contest . I figured it would cross-train my body with new exercise that would sculpt my figure , keep me in shape as I get older , and help me stay fit enough to continue to dance . I love all that is feminine and glamorous and learned that the
32 The Belly Dance Chronicles � July 2016