Tees Life Tees Life issue 11 | Page 58

HARRY PEARSON THE BIG TEES In an issue where we celebrate all things festive and fun, our columnist Harry Pearson takes a walk on the Widow Twankey side to wax lyrical about the beloved British pantomime… A nyone who thinks gender fluidity is a new thing obviously didn’t pay enough attention to British popular culture back in the last four decades of the 20th century. Or, as a friend of mine once summarised, “In the USA men dressing up as women is considered avant-garde and revolutionary, whereas in Britain it’s just your average Saturday night family entertainment.” You can see what he means. After all, in New York a story featuring a handsome young male hero who’s actually a woman and a lovelorn old lady who is, in fact, a man would be a song by Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground, whereas here it’s a Christmas panto that young and old can enjoy. A Walk on the Widow Twankey Side. Pantomime as we know it today was developed back in Victorian times by music hall comedians such as Dan Leno (the boyhood hero of Stan Laurel) and by the start of the new century was more or less a fixture at theatres all over the UK during the festive season. My first encounter with the weird and wonderful world of principal boys and dames came at the age of seven. As a treat for my Bafta-nominated performance as The Innkeeper in Guisborough Park Lane Infant School’s Christmas nativity play I was taken to the church hall to see the annual village pantomime (I only had one line, but in a Meryl Streep-like moment of acting magic made the most of it by knocking over the Wendy house that was doubling as the stable). The production of Babes in the Wood was organised by the local Young Farmers Club. Anyone who knows anything about young farmers will be aware that there is nothing they like better than cross-dressing. The slightest excuse – family fun day, village carnival, outbreak of swine fever – will inevitably be the cue for hordes of burly, 58 ruddy-cheeked sons of the soil to don taffeta frocks, fishnet tights, lipstick and wellington boots and cavort about the place. The phenomenon of farming transvestism is so well known there are some who suspect there must be an EU subsidy for it, though this is by no means the case. Sadly, I can remember little about the production, save that it involved a huge amount of yelling, shouting, bawling and cries of “Oh no, I’m not!” and “Oh yes, you are!”, most of which came from my grandad when my nan told him she’d bought him a ticket and he was coming “Whether he liked it or not”, even if there was boxing on the telly. Later that same Christmas I went on a trip to see a professional panto at the ABC Stockton (The Globe Theatre as it was and now is again). This was much more exciting as it was also the first time I got to see a pop group. The ABC made a habit of booking bands as part of the panto. In previous years they’d had Cliff Richard and Shadows, Billy J Kramer and the Dakotas and the Rockin’ Berries (it would be nice to think The Rolling Stones had once appeared in Mother Goose, but sadly I can find no evidence, though Mick Jagger would have been brilliant in the title role). Now, as part of the cast of Dick Whittington, we had Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick and Tich, whose hit singles You Make It Move, Touch Me, Touch Me and Bend It! admittedly don’t sound all that suitable for a family audience. Leading the rest of cast was Scottish comedian Alex Munro, who’d appeared in On The Buses, but I don’t remember him. In fact, the only thing I do recall of the show is that during the band’s rendition of their future number one hit The Legend of Xanadu Dave Dee cracked a massive bullwhip while my mum tutted and said: “He’ll have someone's eye out with that”. Luckily, there was no health and safety in those days – getting injured, like dragging up, was all part of the festive fun.