Sharing Good Practice
GIVING THROUGH GRIEF FOR
EDUCATORS AND ADMINISTRATORS
By Lisa Fatimah
A
s wisdom warriors, educators
and
administrators,
are
central players, often on-call,
like doctors, 24-7-365. We
unselfishly give of ourselves to others
in need. For many, it is our calling, the
very essence of who we are, and we
are extremely thankful and humbled
for the opportunity to serve, inspire,
educate, enlighten and learn. Ours is
a crucial courageous path with a heart
and daily opportunities to create, guide
and share. As varied as schools are,
so too are our needs and abilities to
multitask melancholy while addressing
our fiduciary responsibilities.
There are however, massive moments
in our lives, when we are either forced
to push past the pain of personal loss
in order to be productive, present and
available. Supreme care is essential
to help our emotional response to
loss which often feels as ominous
as the ancient aepyornis. Often, we
must seek and provide this essential
care ourselves. How can we keep
motivating our scholars, giving
through our grief, while not being
paralyzed by our pain?
Unfortunately, very rarely are educators
and administrators equipped with a
sacred space or given the time, tools
and/or advice necessary to be present
for ourselves during difficult times.
The short sorrow list includes; death,
divorce or illness. There are, of course,
many more life challenges commanding
our attention and we each respond to
tragedy in different ways, including;
automaticity, showcase smiles, short
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temperedness, embracing affection,
discussion, denial, dismissal and/or
retreat.
While there are guidelines that broach
grief in the classroom, many are
designed to help the teacher help the
student. Is it also okay for us to find/
create a sacred space in which, we too
may fall down so we can rise again?
Very few educational programs offer
insight or create (non-judgmental)
spaces for teachers and administrators
to embrace, push through (not just
past) their pain, while simultaneously
staying productive, centered and
being a positive force in the classroom
and schoolhouse.
The website "grievingstudents.org"
offers practical advice for teachers to
help students during times of great
sadness, bereavement and despair.
And the American Federation of
teachers reports that as many as 70%
of students are going through some
type of grief. But how many teachers
are experiencing grief and working
to "keep it together" at school when
they would much rather assume the
fetal position, adorn a bautta and/or
go to bed?
Whether we are team teaching,
embracing
student-led,
lecture,
Class Time
experiential,
constructivist
or
Montessori-style classrooms, teachers
and administrators are still viewed as
being the emotionally available leader
and are center-stage. What can we
do and where do we go when we've
experienced loss? Here are a few
ideas that may prove helpful. Many
have existed for thousands of years.
All ideas listed here are respectfully
shared with the understanding that
grief, like giving, has many layers and
perceptions. Prolonged Grief Disorder
(PGD), like any other great challenge
is often best addressed with the help
of a medical doctor, therapist and/or
psychologist. Whatever methods we
choose, it is important for educators
and administrators to understand that
we are human, and it's more than okay
to be just that. MAKING water and
MAKING time to take GREAT care of
ourselves is not a selfish luxury, it is self
preservation and a moral imperative
for you, your scholars and our world.
Ideas for self-care and to help us
continue to give and GROW through
grief.
• Affirmations
• BE in Nature
• Calling upon a spiritual leader or
counselor
• Crafting
• Comedies
• Cry
• Deep Breathing
• Dancing
• Exercising
• Earth kindness - planting flowers
• Fasting
• Journaling - Memories and Lessons
Learned.
• Massage
• Meditation/ Mindfulness
• Motivational videos
• Recitation
• Prayer
• Reading
• Stretching
• Visualization
As an Orton-Gillingham trained Learning Specialist, Lisa-Fátimah specializes
in designing multisensory English and Spanish language development
lessons, modifications and assessments for traditional and Dyslexic
students. Her radio shows highlight the primacy of girls’ education,
bilingualism and world language acquisition for a global audience.
Email: [email protected].