Synaesthesia Magazine Science & Numbers | Page 42

yourself

yourself

Feel

yourself

Feel

From as far back as I can remember, I wanted to be a writer. Unfortunately, I was one of those 'procrastinating' writers, with several novel ideas, but I suffered from a severe lack of effort in actually producing any of them. Naturally, I ended up teaching literature instead. Then I got breast cancer.

It's funny how something so sinister can actually change your life for the better. Writing became the equivalent of running a tap when the water's been turned off for too long. The first belches and splutters quickly turned into a cool stream of fresh ideas coming directly out of the newly discovered dark underground spring that is cancer.

Five days before Christmas, as I sat in the breast clinic waiting for the results of my biopsy, I bumped into a friend from university. After the initial surprised 'Hi!' moment came the pause where we both assessed our surroundings and quickly arrived at the same cancer-based conclusion about each other. She was there getting the all clear after a mastectomy. We studied literature together tenyears ago and she gave me some advice. She said she wished she'd kept a diary and advised me to do just that if my results turned out to be positive. They were, and I started a blog. The tap was on.

As time and my treatment moved on, I began to extensively research breast cancer. Not just a cursory Google search, but much more in depth. Hell, I was signed off work and didn't feel inclined to do much else. I learnt to decipher the Latinate lexis of complex scientific and medical research so that I could understand this disease and more importantly, why I'd got it. Turns out you'll never

by Maddie Wallace