Sure Travel Journey Vol 5.2 Autumn 2019 | Page 31

• E N R O U T E / / C O V E R S T O R Y © ALL PHOTOS COURTESY BUDDHIST RETREAT CENTRE I’d signed up for a course titled “Finding and keeping your centre”. At the induction session I read the schedule: times of noble silence, workshop times, meal times… and meditation times. I clench my teeth and not-so-nobly but angry at myself. “How on Earth do people do this?” I think, sliding off a puffy pillow for the umpteenth time. At the next meditation session, I notice some people sit-kneeling on little stools. I grab one before the start gong and my experience improves. The teacher guides us through ways to recognise when one is thinking, and how to not get immersed in those thoughts. “Ah. Yes, my car does need a service. Let me return to right now and experience how my breath is cold going in, but warm going out,” she explains. “Don’t hate yourself for having thoughts. We are so hard on ourselves for so much – but why?” Why are we so hard on ourselves? Fishing around in the dark for how to be better, to be balanced. It’s both an © AYOB/SHUTTERSTOCK Above: The meditation hall and view from Nalanda Rocks. Left: Garden Buddha at the BRC. “ It’s both an empowering and terrifying realisation: we are responsible for what knocks us off centre; we choose how to deal with the events and people in our lives. silently think “Bloody hell, I didn’t know we’d be meditating!” I hear a few other people mutter to their partners with similar misgivings; we’d come here for a 48-hour intense and practical quick fix, not to learn how to say “Ohm” and wear orange robes while choking down wafts of incense. Our group of 12 shuffle through to the meditation hall and find a lean, white-bearded man sitting on a cushion at the front of the room. I experience 10 minutes of pure torture. My mind flies, like a bat stuck in a bathroom, from thought to thought, and I am distinctly empowering and terrifying realisation for me: we are responsible for what knocks us off centre; we choose how to deal with the events and people in our lives. During Sunday morning’s free hour, I walk to the BRC shop and buy a meditation stool to take home with me. Our group had completed six meditation sessions by then, and in each session I found it easier to observe a thought, give it a little high-five and send it on its way. Six months later, I haven’t looked at my notes from the course once, but my wooden stool has a beautiful sheen from my bum. MAKE MEMORIES FOR LIFE // 31 “