1. The Squeaky Wheel Gets the Grease Chances are, your male colleagues are constantly vocalizing which opportunities and projects they want— and you might be sitting there, working hard, and waiting to get what is rightfully yours. Sadly, most bosses are too busy to figure out what the most equitable project allocation is, and it often comes down to who yapped last to them about that hot media deal or the new partnership your company is launching.
If you aren’ t good at grabbing your boss in the hall or during your morning coffee break and bringing up the projects that excite you, then schedule formal time to check in at least once a month and let your boss know what you’ d like to work on.
2. Beer is for Bonding The best career opportunities often come out of interactions outside the office— often over a beer or drink. The guys I’ ve worked with would grab beers all the time— and I quickly learned to join them, whether or not I felt like drinking that particular night.
And if you’ re not invited( yes, this happened to me), create your own happy hour invitation— who can turn down a cold brewski?
3. Avoid Being Too Easily Offended Guys have this thing at work called the Circle of Trust. You gain entry when they know they can be themselves around you, without being reported to HR. In the banking analyst bullpen, I heard every disgusting story there is to tell— but I stayed cool. And as a result, I eventually became part of the group and was included in the nights of ordering dinner in or going out for beers.
Note: There is a line, and“ staying cool” doesn’ t mean letting the guys cross it— sexual harassment is never OK.
4. Don’ t Be Anyone’ s Coffee or Lunch Getter How many successful men in the workplace do you see picking up their boss’ s lunch or coffee? If you’ re not someone’ s assistant, do not get in the habit of acting like one. Sure, maybe there are special exceptions when your boss is in fire drill mode or decides to treat a group for getting his coffee— but don’ t make it a regular thing.
And if your male peers aren’ t chipping in— then you shouldn’ t be doing it, either.
5. Don’ t Be the“ Yes” Woman In the industries I’ ve worked in, there’ s tremendous pressure to work hard and keep an overflowing plate. Lunch and coffee runs aside, it’ s all too easy to say yes to every project as you strive to“ be a good employee”— but if you never say no, you’ ll ultimately just hurt both yourself and your company.
It’ s important to stand up for the projects you really want to work on( see # 1), and then push back at other times when you don’ t have capacity. You can bet many of the guys say no— and you should, too.
6. Play to Your Strengths( Even When They’ re Stereotypes) The first week of my banking internship, my managing director asked me how the interns were doing and feeling. I’ m willing to bet he asked me partly because I was the only woman there, and he assumed I was therefore most likely to know about people’ s“ feelings.”
But you know what? I did. And thus started our mutually beneficial relationship: I gave him a live read of the pulse of the group he was managing, and he gave me the opportunity for senior exposure. Whether it’ s listening, emotional aptitude, empathy, socializing or just being the den mother— if you have these strengths, play to them.
They’ re good qualities to demonstrate as a rising future leader, and, particularly in a workplace where those skills are in short supply, they’ re also not a bad way to get noticed.