pastor bold enough to talk about child sexual abuse from a pulpit ; rarer still is the abuse survivor in the congregation feeling heard , valued and understood by ministry leaders . Both sides of this must change . Pastors must be willing to address this issue , impacting so many , with intentionality . Prevention must become a priority , and a proper response to abuse allegations must become commonplace , rather than unusual , in ministry contexts . Learn more about Josh McDowell Ministries at www . josh . org .
OVERCOMING BARRIERS Some ministry leaders fear that the topic of child sexual abuse is offputting or even frightening to congregants . The subject is admittedly uncomfortable , as it encompasses non-consensual and harmful sexual contact , but the difficulty of a topic shouldn ’ t keep pastors from addressing it , particularly when the issue impacts so many . Sexual abuse is an attack on individual children ( typically the most vulnerable ), families , marriages and churches . Take inventory of any barriers creating hesitation to speak from the front and reevaluate : whatever barriers exist , compare them to the bondage , shame , fracture and isolation experienced by so many .
BENEFITS End the Silence and Secrecy Addressing child sexual abuse from the main stage has significant benefits . A forthright communication from the pulpit acknowledging child sexual abuse supports the first step in changing ministry culture . When ministry leaders directly and compassionately address sexual abuse , the whole subject matter comes out of the closet . Remember , the No . 1 reason children don ’ t tell : no one will believe me . That tool — SECRECY — must be immediately removed from the abuser : the Church must hear and report . When ministry culture shifts away from silence and secrecy , encouraging a culture of communication , abuse survivors are supported , and the resulting awareness hinders the abuser ’ s grooming process .
Invitation , Rather than Isolation As a ministry experiences culture change in this manner , abuse survivors feel invited , rather than isolated . Pathways to healing emerge , with the Church leading the way ; the Church becomes a safe place , rather than a place of silence or condemnation . As culture changes , preventative measures might be implemented and made sustainable . When congregants are given the why , they are more likely to embrace change that might be otherwise resisted .
CHANGE BEGINS AT THE TOP Kimberlee Norris : Creating and sustaining a safe environment for children and abuse survivors starts with senior leadership , including the senior pastor . When the need is clearly communicated by the face of the ministry , congregants more clearly understand that the need is real , pressing and prioritized by the ministry . In our Assessment work with ministries large and small , I have found that when senior pastors are present and participating in training and the rolling out of new policy expressions , constructive change occurs in a healthy manner . When the senior pastor isn ’ t present , constructive change is less likely . Senior pastors and ministry leaders must lead by example ; clearly communicating the need for training and preventative measures by being present and obviously supportive . When congregants see the senior pastor ( and other key ministry leaders ) present and participating , constructive change is more likely to occur . The takeaway ? Senior pastors must lead the charge ; anything less is simply checking the box .
WORDS CAN HEAL AND HURT Gregory Love : This encouragement to ‘ preach from the front ’ presumes preparation . Many pastors mean well but can cause great damage without an accurate understanding of child sexual abuse . Pastors must understand the abuser ’ s grooming process : the process by which an abuser manipulates child victims — and their gatekeepers — into trusted time alone . Pastors must understand the trauma commonly experienced by victims of sexual abuse , and how that trauma varies depending on whether the abuser was a parent , sibling , coach , or held a ministry-related position . It is important that the pastor appreciate the impact based on the intensity and duration of the abuse . Pastors must understand the impact of a child attempting to make an outcry and being ignored , minimized or simply considered untruthful — an experience akin to being re-victimized . Words ‘ from the front ’ can be a balm of healing . Words from the front can also do a great deal of damage without an appreciation of the facts and experiences . For example , it is amazing how many ministry leaders presume ‘ you should be over it by now ’ when an adult shares their story about abuse as a child many years prior . Don ’ t presume that . Time , by itself , does not heal . Preparation should precede preaching .
ONGOING EFFORT Addressing the topic of sexual abuse should be an ongoing effort — like Easter not Christmas . Though Easter occurs every Spring , the message of the resurrection is not limited to a dedicated month . Commit to making sexual abuse — prevention , response and healing — part of the ongoing fabric of communication . Culture is not changed in a sermon ; culture is changed by an ongoing effort to preach , teach , communicate , pray and come alongside families eager for direction . April is Child Abuse Prevention Month ; that does not make April the scheduled and obligatory time to focus on abuse — like a Christmas message . April as Abuse Prevention Month was designed to help us begin a focus that would become an always-focus . What does that look like ? Communicate from the front . Invite outside experts to address leadership and families — sexual abuse counselors , trauma-informed professionals , crimes-against-children detectives and more . Allow survivors with a message of hope to share with leadership and families . Provide Parent Training to families to allow them to better protect the children in their home . Provide age-appropriate instruction to children , which will provide protection and create a pathway for already-victimized children to communicate with adults . Take all steps necessary to ensure that leadership and families clearly understand the child abuse reporting requirements and the church ’ s commitment to follow those requirements .
SUMMARY April is Child Abuse Prevention Month . Let ’ s not wait until April to focus on prevention . When the culture changes , the stage is set for prevention and healing . The culture in the Church will not truly change unless ministry leaders lead — by addressing sexual abuse from the front and inviting others to share and be heard .
Kimberlee Norris and Gregory Love are partners in the Fort Worth , Texas law firm of Love & Norris [ www . lovenorris . com ] and founders of MinistrySafe [ www . MinistrySafe . com ], providing child sexual abuse expertise to ministries worldwide . After representing victims of child sexual abuse for more than two decades , Love and Norris saw recurring , predictable patterns in predatory behavior . MinistrySafe grew out of their desire to place proactive tools into the hands of ministry professionals . Love and Norris teach the only graduate-level course on Preventing Sexual Abuse in Ministry Contexts as Visiting Faculty at Dallas Theological Seminary .
58 CHURCH EXECUTIVE • STOP CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE churchexecutive . com