Praying for the accused
Recently , a pastor was arrested for a sexual abuse charge related to his employment at two separate churches . The statement released by the second church urged the congregation to pray for ‘ John ’ ( the alleged abuser ) and his family .
This is an example of an abuser-centric response . Ministry leaders and others are certainly free to pray for the alleged perpetrator , but DO NOT urge the victim ’ s family and the congregation to do so .
Instead , express care for those who have suffered abuse : pray for the victim and his or her family ; pray for others who have been abused or marginalized — especially by someone in a ministry position .
Providing a character reference
A staff member of a church was arrested for sexual abuse of a child within the congregation . The parents of the accused abuser were long-time members . The abuser plead guilty and was scheduled for sentencing .
The parents of the abuser asked church leaders to provide character reference letters for him such that he might receive a lighter sentence . The senior pastor , music minister and administrative pastor agreed ; each sent a reference letter supporting the accused , requesting leniency and encouraging forgiveness .
The child victim and her family ( still members of the church ) were in the courtroom when the letters were read . The family felt outraged , betrayed , and believed their spiritual leaders chose the abuser over the abused . They subsequently vented to media representatives present in the courtroom .
The headline the next day read : Church Leaders Help Abuser Avoid Punishment . The family left the church , sought legal counsel , and filed a lawsuit .
A victimized child is harm enough ; a child re-victimized by an abusercentric response is inexcusable .
As a result , a significant majority of Americans : ( 1 ) Have been victimized as a child ; ( 2 ) Are married to someone who was victimized as a child ; ( 3 ) Have a child who was victimized ; or ( 4 ) Have a family member or loved one who was victimized as a child .
For many , issues involving child sexual abuse will have a strongly emotional context . Because 2 out of 3 sexually abused children will not disclose abuse until adulthood ( if ever ), it is unrealistic to assume ministry leaders know who has — or has not — suffered abuse in the past .
Instead , leaders must assume that congregants , and the public-at-large , are processing information from the standpoint of an abused child , or that of an abused child ’ s parent , spouse , sibling or close friend .
AVOID THESE PITFALLS
Having provided an overview of various responses , several statements or actions virtually guarantee a poor result .
‘ Innocent until proven guilty ’
Never remind your congregation that the accused is ‘ innocent until proven guilty .’ Though you might be correctly quoting a maxim of our judicial system , this statement has a negative impact in any abuse situation .
To an abuse victim , ‘ innocent until proven guilty ’ is interpreted as , ‘ You were not abused unless you can prove it .’
Remember : false allegations are rare .
churchexecutive . com
HOW TO ADDRESS HISTORICAL ALLEGATIONS
Historical allegations — those that relate to alleged abuse occurring years or decades ago — have become common . For reporting purposes , ministries should treat any historical allegation as if the alleged abuse occurred today .
If the alleged abuse occurred ‘ on your watch ’ or the alleged abuser is a current or former staff member or volunteer , report to the appropriate authorities . Do not assume that the passage of time makes a report timebarred or irrelevant ; from a public perception standpoint , this looks like cover-up .
In general , when in doubt ... report .
CREATE A PRE-EXISTING PLAN
Every ministry should have a pre-existing plan to address sexual abuse allegations . This plan should :
• Be written , known to church leaders , and periodically reviewed .
• Be followed regardless of the identity of the alleged abuser — senior pastor , VBS face-painter or volunteer . NO ONE should be outside the scope of the plan .
• Identify each individual ’ s specific responsibilities , contact information for critical personnel ( insurance agent , carrier , attorney ), and location of critical documents ( relevant state reporting law , insurance policies ).
• Include clear instructions concerning reporting requirements : to whom , within what timeframe , and what information to report .
• Require that each individual making a report on behalf of the ministry request a file number and name of agency representative to be included in a dated incident report .
• Designate a media or information point person within the ministry , and a communication tree ( phone , email and / or text ) to inform key staff members , lay leaders and ministry stakeholders . The point person should be someone who can communicate with empathy and care but resist the impulse to ‘ free-form ’.
STOP CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE • CHURCH EXECUTIVE 23