please have All Things Bright and Beautiful and Morning has Broken
because they’re the only ones we know?
Of course, this all begs the question: “Who is the funeral for? Is it to reflect
the tastes of the deceased to comfort the bereaved? Or is it a bit of both?”
But I’m afraid, when it comes to planning one’s funeral, the priest does not
visit your friends from church or the pub but your next-of-kin at home. They
may not share your faith or know anything about that lovely funeral you had
planned in your mind. They didn’t know because you hadn’t written it down.
I once organised an evening in church entitled “Planning your own Funeral”.
I invited the local undertaker to come along to answer any questions. We
tried to make it fairly light-hearted and ended up going long over the time
we’d set because we were sharing so many stories (and not all of them very
serious either). I had made up a worksheet with all the questions you might
think of when planning a funeral and asked people to leave them with their
next-of-kin or priest.
I encouraged people to write their own story; where they were born; details
of education and employment; siblings and good friends; hobbies and
holidays – all the sort of thing that might take the pressure off your nearest
and dearest when they are trying to remember during those dark days
between death and the funeral. Of course the family can add to it with their
own memories and reminiscences but it really does make a huge difference
having something to build upon.
You might think that this is all a bit unnecessary or even unpleasant. We
don’t really like to think about death. But wouldn’t you do anything that could
help relieve the burden for those who mourn? Wouldn’t it bring comfort
knowing that your “send-off” was just as you’d wanted it to be? I know that
some people pre-pay their funeral so that the burden is not with the relatives
and this is really no different from that.
So please give it some thought. Discuss it with your loved ones before
circumstances are such that you really don’t feel that you can without
causing upset. I am happy to send out a copy of the form I use but equally
you could make up your own.
And then you can rest in peace.
[email protected]
Editor: Rev Lesley-ann keeps telling everyone “Things are happening at St
Oswald’s – signs of the Holy Spirit”.
Well, unbeknown to the attendees of the Monday evening “Acts – Study
Group, Acts 4:32 – 5:16” Brigitte (who was not present on 16 May 2016)
submitted this piece published in 2011 by a SEC Priest.
Is this not an exact replica of our wayward conversation?
StOM Page 17