come home in a constant state of weariness , no longer am I constantly stressed about deadlines and workload . God is doing a profound work in my life … I am waiting on Him to show me where I should be . I am not waiting in a passive catatonic state – far from it . I am on the biggest , most challenging journey ever . Like Peter , I am stepping out the boat and yes there is fear . Like Peter , when I take my eyes of Jesus , I begin to drown . God has a lot to do in me in this time of waiting , a transforming of my character has begun or better articulated in Romans 12 . v 2 “ Do not be conformed to this world , but be transformed by the renewing of your mind . Then you will be able to discern what is the good , pleasing , and perfect will of God .”
Right now , I am learning to be prepared for unexpected answers to prayer . I am learning to trust a little more each day and I have an unquenchable thirst to learn more of the Trinity . If I miss Eucharist , I am hungry . If I miss fellowship with the church family , I feel homesick . Perhaps the biggest challenge right now , for me is to learn to ‘ Be Still ’, to be silent . Each morning and in each situation I am learning to seek the Father ’ s will . A great truth in Psalm 62 . V 1-2 describes this “ My soul waits in silence for God only ; From Him is my salvation . He only is my rock and my salvation , My stronghold ; I shall not be greatly shaken ”.
Waiting on God has meant I have to learn to have a single and consistent focus on God . A focus on all He is and all He has done . It is very much finding silence , to allow God to speak . David Adam ’ s words describe this beautifully to me :
“ Open my eyes that I may see , The Presence that is all about me . Open my ears that I may hear , The voice that is quiet yet ever near . Open my heart that I may feel , The love of my God close and real . Open each sense , make me aware , Of the power and Peace always there ” 1
Waiting is about anticipation , a confident expectation and hope . Listening with expectation . I may not know where this journey will take me , but with certainty I know some of the steps along the way . The next step , is confirmation . For me this is a deeply significant moment of obedience . It is a choice ; it is a response to the Father ’ s calling to commit ever deeper to a life with Christ . I have recently read some of the words of the confirmation rite … they are simply beautiful words …
“ Come , Creator Spirit , rekindle in ( name ) your gifts of grace , to love and serve as a disciple of Christ ”
It will be an honour to be with Linda Hardie and Lucy as we are presented for confirmation on the 28 th of August this year with our family at St . Oswald ’ s . Please remember us in your prayers at this time .
1
David Adam , The Eye of the Eagle . Pg . 13 Linda
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