SPLICED STUFF /
ISSUE 06
FEATURE / THE ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE
You’re stocked up on supplies and away from any immediate danger, but that tree
branch or chair leg is really only going to last you so long before you need something
sturdier to survive the shambling hordes. Luckily the Spliced team is here for you. Our
writers have compiled a list of some of their most ingenious zombie killing weapons.
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/ RAY /
/ ISAAC /
ELECTRIFIED CRUTCH BATON:
The handle and support would be
rubberised, with nodes sticking
out the back to support a pair of jumper
cables. Those in turn would be clipped to a
car battery that swings from my hip in a bag
fashioned from duct tape and aerolite (ceiling
insulation so that I don't get shocked)
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/ SAM /
ELECTRIFIED TABLET
BAYONET: I'm able to
electrocute zombies, while
keeping up to date on the latest spotted
herds (there’s even an extra battery
juice!) Simply ram the electrified
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bayonets into the brain and zap, no more
walking biting pile of rotting bones. I had
far too much fun doing this and really
need to get out the house more. (She
even put together a prototype and sent
photos! – now THAT’s dedication! - Ed)
/ DANI /
OAR-XE: The combination of
a rowing oar and an axe, the
square part of the oar is dipped
in metal and fashioned to resemble the
blade of an axe. Although somewhat
cumbersome, the length of the oar allows
for close-range attacks while keeping the
user at a safe distance.
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ZOMBIE-LEATHER ONESIE:
Hunt and pillage at leisure in a
bite-resistant genuine ZombieLeather onesie. Undetectable to the
undead, but still warm and cosy without
having to smear yourself in rancid guts.
Tanned from the weathered skins of all
those people in the 70's who thought that
baby oil in direct sunlight was a good idea.
Now with all-weather tire tread soles for
long walks on the tarmac.
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/ SARAH /
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CHAINSAW TUTU:
Why should style have to suffer
just because the world is overrun