Spark [Robert_Klitzman]_When_Doctors_Become_Patients(Boo | Page 299

288 Interacting with Their Patients students to these topics. For example, Jerry, the surgeon-lawyer, saw other ways to improve communication skills concerning sexuality: teaching medical students in history-taking not to ask, ‘‘Are you married?’’ but ‘‘Do you have a partner?’’ In speaking about safer sex with patients, Paul had learned to use blunt, rather than medical, terms to open up con- versation (‘‘saying ‘fucking,’ ‘sucking,’ and ‘going down’ instead of using technical words, tends to open things up’’). Professional roles can prompt professional language that may suboptimally convey information. Doctors also used their own failures to talk to their providers about health behaviors, such as unsafe sex, to approach patients more effec- tively. Jeff, the adolescent specialist with HIV, drew on his experience of how hard it was to follow his own physician’s advice concerning nonadherence to safer sex and medications. I assume health-negating behavior, and take it from there. Doctors say teenagers lie to them. But teenagers don’t. They can’t tell me the truth because I’m not being effective in getting to it. So it’s my problem. When I hear false stuff from a teenager, I’ve screwed up; they haven’t. Jeff admitted that he had in fact dissembled to doctors, and hence learned to ask his patients about health behaviors more effectively than he had before. I won’t ask, ‘‘Do you use condoms?’’ but ‘‘Do you use condoms some of the time, never, or all the time?’’ If they want to say 100 percent of the time, I say, ‘‘Absolutely 100 percent of the time? Most people slip up once. When did you? How?’’ Again they have to say, ‘‘No, I’ve never done that.’’ I assume drug experimentation. The other day, a former patient thanked me: ‘‘I couldn’t tell you many things, but you would tell me, so then I didn’t have to tell you.’’ Usually, such nonpsychiatrist physicians see these patients first or ex- clusively, making this ability to gather delicate information crucial. Giving Bad News: Framing Information These physicians heightened their sensitivity, too, to how they presented medical information—the contexts in which they used it, and the need to ground it in a realistic sense of patients’ experiences. Particularly with poor prognoses, these doctors highlighted the importance of ‘‘framing data.’’