Only one body part connects us to another object during the act of touching, and that’s (you guessed it), the skin. Its vast network of tactile receptors reside on or just beneath its surface. Some areas of the body – fingertips, the tip of the tongue, the back of the neck, to name three – have more receptors than others, making them more sensitive. Ever notice how a tiny pinprick on your middle finger can hurt more than a gash in your knee? Or how fiendishly ticklish the back of your neck can be?
Humans are not the only beings on this earth nurtured and kept alive by touch; animals and plants are, too. Dogs are particularly fond of a good rub on the tummy and a cuddle as part of their greeting ritual, and plants respond to touch as well – some more than others. The mimosa pudica plant, for example, responds to touch by curling its leaves – a wonderful chance for us to make meaningful contact with a being from another realm.
Even though our skin may seem to involve the purely physical aspect of touch, at times it cleverly overrides our best attempts to conceal our private interior emotions. After all, it’s impossible to hide a blush; is it not? And how easily can those around us tell how truly shocked we are upon hearing bad news by observing how much colour drains from our face? Very easily.
Conscious touch is the intercourse of tenderness and love, which holds the match to the fire of passion. Conversely, an angry grasp from a disconnected, hardened heart can have the effect of being helplessly submerged underwater by a huge iceberg – the callousness of the touch paralyzing.
No other form of communication is as universally understood as touch. “The compassionate touch of a hand or a reassuring hug can take away our fears, soothe our anxieties, and fill the emptiness of being lonely” says Florida-based author and broadcaster Randi G. Fine.
Here are a few tips to increase touch in your everyday life:
• Feel the touch and warmth of your dog or cat as it sits on or next to you.
• Feel the smoothness of water as it cascades down your spine in the shower, or its silkiness around your body in a bath, pool or the ocean.
• Feel the wind on your skin as it dances with the tiny vellus hair (peach fuzz) that covers your body.
Europeans, especially southern Europeans, tend to be more used to human touch than North Americans, with frequent handshakes and kisses on each cheek upon greeting friends and family. If you’re not used to touching your nearest and dearest, start with these easy steps:
• Put your hand on your loved one’s shoulder as you pour him or her something to drink.
• Give your friend or partner a conscious loving touch on the upper arm or back as you walk by.
• Lay your hand gently on your loved one’s hand as you sit together and talk.
Once we free our minds, we can begin to notice and enjoy all sorts of touch experiences: the touch of the wind as it caresses our skin; the sun’s rays penetrating our naked bodies and awakening our innate sensuality; the soft embrace of waves as we inch courageously into a cool ocean or lake; the grainy, abrasive-cleansing feel of sea sand; the infinitely firm softness of an eagle’s feather; the slithering sliminess of bull kelp beneath and between our toes.
“Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair,” said the famous prophet Kahlil Gibran.
In other words, keep in touch with touch. You’ll be the happier for it.