Solutions December 2019 | Page 11

call this “context,” I call it living in truth. From the place where I’m waiting backstage, I can see spotlights and a crowd of eight thousand. Why did I ever agree to do this? I look for an exit sign and pray one word, help, but it’s too late to escape. As the emcee introduces me, I sense an inner whisper, “You’re not here to impress them, you’re here impress them.” With those few words, the context changes. My mind and heart accept the statement as truth. What my brain first labeled a threat is now an opportunity. When we experience fear, we can pause and ask these three questions: A few years ago, I talked with a friend in the middle of an intense struggle. She kept saying, “I guess this is just who I am now.” I finally stopped her and said, “This isn’t who you are, it’s where you are today. It’s your location, not your identity.” Shame-based fear tempts us to hide and keep silent. If you’re in a hard place too, dare to tell God and one other person you trust then get whatever help you need. With the support of his family and friends, Goepper went to rehab and came out stronger, winning silver at the 2018 Olympic Games. 1. What am I saying to myself right now? 2. Is it true? 3. If not, what is true? Nick Goepper says, “I like to quote the verse, ‘I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.’ I…envision me skiing and God is kind of like an eagle right next to me screeching in my ear that everything is going to be all good.” Resist Shame and Guilt Despite his faith, things weren’t “all good” for Goepper after the 2014 Olympics. He found himself in a downward spiral of depression and drinking. He says, “I was constantly thinking about ways to end my own life.” Fear often invites in a different but also destructive emotion, shame. Surface fear is about our performance, shame- based fear is about who we are as a person. What if we’re inadequate, unworthy, a failure? Move Forward Anyway Nick also faced a series of shoulder injuries. Alex Cohen, the senior sport psychologist for the U.S. Olympic Committee, says, “That return to play after an injury requires confidence when an athlete questions whether they have what it takes to get back there.” For Olympic athletes, and all of us, hurt is inevitable; how we respond to it is optional. Sometimes because of what Solutions • 11