Hallmarks of Real Love
Real love isn’t an unlimited
endorsement of sinful behaviors.
With so many of the behaviors
championed by our society
being destructive to emotional and
physical health, it is unloving to
endorse, approve of, or encourage
people to engage in them.
As A. W. Tozer observed, “When we
become so tolerant that we lead people
into mental fog and spiritual darkness,
we are not acting like Christians—we
are acting like cowards.”
Wa s Te r i b e i n g c o w a r d l y b y
compromising her Christian
values? Perhaps. What is certain
is that she taught her daughter
that compromise of her beliefs is
acceptable. #againnot
Now, let’s park here a moment
to remind ourselves of something
important: None of us get to condemn
others engaged in sin. We get to point
it out, yes, to help lead them back to
righteousness. But we do not get to
beat people over the head with their
bad conduct. Jesus didn’t condemn
the people that the Bible tells us
he met and healed. But neither did
he ignore their sin. He acknowledged
it, and lovingly told them to repent.
Take the Samaritan woman, for
example. Though Jesus didn’t approve
of her adultery, he was kind, gentle,
and loving to her. He saw the beauty,
the potential, and the innate worth
and dignity God infused into her as
his child. Jesus loved her as she was,
but gave her a vision of who she could
be, if she committed to living by God’s
standards.
Like Teri, you likely feel the parental
tug to accommodate your son or
daughter’s lifestyle choices. Or you
might feel hurt or angry, and want
to lash out. It’s a difficult balance,
for sure, to be loving while also not
appearing to endorse the sin. We
might fail at it. The best we can do is
pray for God’s wisdom and guidance.
Be gentle in your disappointment.
“When we become so tolerant that
we lead people into mental fog and
spiritual darkness, we are not acting like
Christians—we are acting like cowards.”
-A.W. Tozer
58 • Solutions