Jottings
from previous page
but British innovator Mahabir Gill says
his patented design could save industry
many thousands in wasted hours. In the
UK alone, he claims, £4 billion (€4.7
billion) could be saved.
While toilets are presently built with a
horizontal seat, Mr Gill’s design has the
seated angled at 13 degrees downwards.
He says he has tested prototypes and
concluded that seated on a down-facing
slope at 11 degrees remains comfortable
for 15 minutes, but at 13 degrees, comfort
evaporates after a maximum of five to
seven minutes.
Unsurprisingly, the design has been
heavily mocked on social media with
someone questioning whether Donald
Trump would Tweet less if he had one.
Full details at standardtoilet.net if you’re
flushed with curiosity.
And while we’re at it, congratulations go
to Manchester City Council who have
just acquired eight new road gritting
lorries. In a moment of brilliant insanity,
some enlightened soul decided to invite
the public to name each of the sparkling
new vehicles. So Manchester now boasts
a fleet of gritters called Basil Salty, Grit
Astley, Gritter Thunberg, Slushay Away,
Snowbi-Gone Kenobi, Snowel Gallagher,
Spreaddie Flintoff and Spreaddie
Mercury.
Spare a thought for ...
... Florida police who rushed to a home
in Lake Worth Beach just after Christmas
to investigate reports of a woman
screaming for help. What they found was
a 40-year-old parrot called Rambo who
had been taught to squawk “Help, help –
let me out!” by his owner when he was a
child.
... Davíd from León who woke up in the
toilet of his local bar hours after the
businesses had closed and locked-up for
the night. However, he did not panic but
poured himself a beer, shared a video of
his problem on social media, eventually
called the Guardia Civil and offered
officers a beer when they arrived to
rescue him. Unfortunately, his video
went viral and Davíd is now maintaining
a low profile.
... Burger King whose new soy-based
version of its Whopper burger is not
suitable for vegetarians or vegans ...
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because it’s cooked on the same grill as
meat burgers. The chain explained it was
aimed at “flexitarians” ...
... Someone at the UK’s Ministry of
Housing, Communities and Local
Government who decided to launch the
“Town of the Year” contest in
Wolverhampton last month, and then
published a jolly press release featuring
Communities Secretary, Robert Jenrick,
touring the “town centre.”
Wolverhampton has been a city for 19
years - and it’s where Mr Jenrick was
born and educated.
And finally ...
Last September, Matthew Davies, 47,
robbed a Bank of Scotland branch in
Dunfermline, armed with a meat cleaver.
The High Court in Glasgow was told last
month that he pulled the weapon out of
a pillowcase before putting the case over
his face in an attempt to conceal his
identity, but then quickly removing it.
Prosecutor Stewart Ronnie said, “This
was due to a failure to create eye holes.”
He was handed almost £2,000 before
making his escape. A witness said,” He
was walking very slowly, even stopping
to pat a dog.” Davies pleaded guilty.