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3 WAYS TO AVOID TAKING YOURSELF HOSTAGE
NEGOTIATION TACTICS

Negotiation Tactics

3 WAYS TO AVOID TAKING YOURSELF HOSTAGE

BY CHRIS VOSS

A while back , I wrote about three ways negotiators take themselves hostage and what you can do to avoid making these same missteps .

Since then , I ’ ve identified three additional negotiation tactics that end up putting you in a terrible position at the table .
Read on to learn more about each of them and what you can do to avoid having these negotiation tactics derail your efforts .
1 . YOU BELIEVE IN LEVERAGE ( THERE IS NO SPOON FROM THE MATRIX ).
Jim Camp , the author of Start with No ( one of our top 12 must-read books for expert negotiators ) has always said that there ’ s no such thing as leverage .
In the early days of The Black Swan Group , we used to say the opposite : “ There is always leverage .”
How do you sort this out ? Change “ leverage ” to “ influence ”— and trust-based influence more specifically .
If you ’ re not trained in The Black Swan Method™ , you believe that leverage is an external thing ; either the circumstances have given it to you or they have not .
This is a passive stance that surrenders control to the situation . In other words , you ’ ve allowed the situation to take you hostage .
When you believe in “ influence ,” you take back control — and also your ability to affect the outcome . You switch from the zerosum game of bargaining to the positivesum game of negotiation .
One of the many insights about life from Molly Bloom ’ s book Molly ’ s Game is that everyone pretty much has the same luck . In case you ’ re unfamiliar , Molly ran high- stakes poker games in Los Angeles and New York City . To keep the games together and thriving over time , she needed to make sure the players were all at about the same skill level . The players would have good nights where they won big , and they would have bad nights where they lost big . But over the course of a year , if the players were evenly matched , they would all pretty much break even .
Leverage equates to luck . So , what ’ s the difference maker ? The time you spend increasing your skills .
2 . YOU ’ RE AFRAID TO STRESS-TEST WHETHER OR NOT YOU ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND .
The great misinterpretation of the advice from Stephen Covey that tells us to “ Seek first to understand , then to be understood ” occurs when people convince themselves they actually do understand — usually based
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