IT IS INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT FOR SUPER-SMART PEOPLE TO HEAR SOMETHING WITH WHICH THEY DISAGREE , WITHOUT PROVING THAT THE OTHER PERSON IS WRONG .
BAD HABITS OF SMART LEADERS
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“ Our mission in life is to make a positive difference – not to prove how smart we are .”
2 . PROVING HOW RIGHT WE ARE
One night , I had dinner with a top , fourstar general from the US Army . We were surrounded by other two- to four-star generals . Each of these men and women had graduate degrees and were chosen to be two- to four-star generals over thousands of competitors . He asked me an interesting question : “ Marshall , who is your favorite customer ?”
I replied : “ Sir , my favorite customer is smart , dedicated , driven to achieve , has incredible integrity , gets results – and is a stubborn , opinionated know-it-all who never wants to admit he or she is wrong .”
I looked around the room and asked : “ Do you think any of the generals in this very room may fit such a description ?”
He laughed and replied : “ We have a targetrich opportunity !”
IT IS INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT FOR SUPER-SMART PEOPLE TO HEAR SOMETHING WITH WHICH THEY DISAGREE , WITHOUT PROVING THAT THE OTHER PERSON IS WRONG .
After all , if others disagree with us , we assume , because we are so smart , they must be wrong . They may not be stupid people , they are just confused on this particular issue . The higher up we move in leadership , the more destructive this habit may become .
One of the ‘ super-smart ’ scientists I worked with , Dr . Jones , led the research and development function for a large corporation .
He was so smart , he knew more about the other scientists ’ fields than they did ! The good news was that he was very honest . The bad news was that he could be incredibly blunt . When people ‘ took him on ’ he almost always proved they were wrong and he made them feel embarrassed .
You might guess what happened . He was always right , until the day he was wrong . He mistakenly supported one disastrous decision that ended up reducing the market capitalization of the company by more than $ 10 billion !
After this disaster , several of the scientists who worked for him were interviewed . They all said they had had doubts about the project , but they never raised them . Why ? Since Dr . Jones was convinced that this was the right thing to do , they assumed he must be correct . Even though they had doubts , they didn ’ t want to take him on and risk being humiliated .
One of the telltale comments that I often receive in 360 ° feedback from direct reports is : “ He doesn ’ t bear fools gladly !”
Any leader who takes this feedback as a badge of honor is making a mistake . Unless the chief executive is managing a group of ‘ fools ’ – a situation I have never encountered – the real message behind this feedback is : “ This leader always has to prove he or she is right and treats people who disagree with him or her as fools .”
3 . I ALREADY KNOW THAT
It is incredibly difficult for smart people to listen to someone tell them something they know without pointing out : “ I already know that .”
Imagine you are my boss . I am young , dedicated and enthusiastic . I come to you with an idea . You think it is a great idea .
Rather than just saying : “ Great idea !” which gives credit to the other person , the tendency is to say : “ That is a great idea , I already knew that !” which gives credit to yourself .
Next time , just say : “ Great idea !”
What is probably the most common phrase uttered by smart people when others say something that we agree with ? “ No , I agree with you .”
Sometimes we say : “ No , I think that is fantastic !”
In the future , listen to other people respond to ideas they agree with . You will be amazed how many times the first word out of the person ’ s mouth is “ no ”.
Grammatically , this makes no sense . If we agree with someone , why don ’ t we say : “ Yes , I agree with you !”
The “ no ” means : “ Of course I agree with you . I already knew that . You are confusing me with someone who needs to hear you right now .” It ’ s subconscious , of course . Inside the mind , the super-smart leader probably thinks that he or she is doing the right thing – giving praise for an idea . But the “ no ” sounds negative and takes away the praise , just leaving the sense that there is no idea in the world that the leader didn ’ t have first .
4 . WHY CAN ’ T THEY BE ME ?
Joe , one of the ‘ super-smart ’ leaders I have coached , graduated as the valedictorian of an Ivy League school . His parents were very poor and he had to work his way through both high school and college . Graduating as the top student at a top school when you are given no advantages as a child is an amazing achievement . Joe was both brilliant and incredibly hardworking .
Joe faced a classic challenge common to the ‘ super-smart ’. He could not understand why other people failed to see solutions that seemed obvious to him . I watched as he led his team meeting . Each of his direct reports was instructed to share an update on their progress against each of their key objectives . One person was clearly having problems meeting goals . Joe said : “ Have you thought of trying X ?” The direct report replied : “ No , I never thought of that .”
Joe became very frustrated : “ Can ’ t you see how X would help you solve your problem ? It seems obvious to me !”
Joe then looked around the table and said , “ Didn ’ t any of you think of X ?” When it was clear that no-one had , he grunted : “ I cannot believe that I am the only person in the room that figured this out ! What were all of you thinking about ?”
After the meeting , I had to explain to Joe
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