Comfluential™ Leadership: Balancing our Feminine and Masculine
|39 |
How do you find balance in your business and your life?
When I think of balance, what comes to me is the kind we find inside ourselves. We as women have a particular challenge with our inner alignment because of our gender heritage.
What is gender heritage?
Culture, politics, families - the very social fabric of everyday life - affects how we see ourselves as humans and as women. Throughout our lives, we women have been receiving the message that the qualities that make us feminine are not valued, especially in the workplace or in politics. “Feminine” qualities include creativity, influence, collaboration, cooperation, compassion, empathy, intuition, patience, vision, emotions and “heart.”
So, we learned as very young girls to hide those qualities behind a mask or behind a curtain.
Enter the masculine leadership model...
If we did step out, it was by taking on the qualities of the masculine role model accepted by society, since men typified leadership. The “masculine” qualities include using mind over
heart, being commanding, competitive and action-oriented, valuing process over vision, and acting assertive or aggressive to get things done. We would try our best to fit into that mold, but we could never quite fit the picture men (and many women) had of what leadership looks like.
I understand this because...this was me. I come from a military background where, to be successful, you needed to follow the masculine model – you commanded. I didn’t see myself as a leader, but in the military I had to learn command, to put on that mask and be that person. I did what so many of my female colleagues did, and still do, in the military and corporate environments – I suppressed my feminine qualities and adapted to what I thought was the correct model of leadership.
Take a moment to think about ways you have done this in your life, and maybe still are doing it, trying to fit into the male model of leadership you grew up with.
Does this feel balanced to you?
Enter Comfluential™ Leadership...
Of course, when we women suppress the feminine side of our power, we are also suppressing who we are as people and the full range of the gifts we have to share with the world.
Over time I discovered that the most successful leaders find a balance between the masculine and feminine qualities of leadership. And now this is what I teach, train, and advocate.
I teach women how to uncover and call up the masculine aspects within them as well as the feminine aspects that they may have been ignoring or tamping down all their lives. They learn to marry the two sides to blend into a cohesive approach, because both are needed to truly lead effectively.
For women this means embracing your feminine qualities of leadership. It’s recognizing that the masculine model completes you, but it doesn't define you.
To explain what this blended model is, I coined the term Comfluential™ Leadership – command + influence. Comfluential™ Leadership is the conversation starter to break through gender heritage, and the out-of-balance view of what a leader looks like. Tapping into her Comfluential™ Leadership abilities, a woman can truly change the world.
I believe strongly that Comfluential™ Leadership is something we as women must master in order for this world to move from the state it’s in now to the state we want it to be.
Comfluential™ Leadership is empowered leadership at its very best.
This season, I encourage you to make the choice to step into this kind of leadership – with unapologetic confidence. It will take courage and conviction (I know you have what it takes)! Remember, you may experience some pushback and it may feel lonely sometimes. Here are some tips to help you along the way:
1) Discover a community of like-minded women who are likely navigating the leadership world like you are. For example, I have an Awaken the Leader Facebook Group, and I would love to invite you to join.
2) Know that you are supported by this remarkable community that comes together in RHG Magazine. Take advantage of the expertise and media opportunities to learn more about yourself, balance, and showing up in the world.
3) Learn leadership skills so you can uncover your Comfluential™ Leadership strengths, talents, and abilities. If you’d like some advice or direction, I’d love to help. Together, we women are stronger!
However you choose to do it, step out, step in, and own your Comfluential™ Leadership. When you marry your masculine and feminine into one unique, empowered, extraordinary leader, you can’t be stopped! You are in balance, fully expressing who you are and what you are meant to bring to the world. And the world will change because of it.
RHG Magazine & TV Guide TM - Fall into Balance 2019 © All rights reserved.