Living with an alcoholic
Genie In The Gutter service user & D2DI graduate Nicola takes a couragous effort to find out the full effects her drinking has had on her Mother. Here Nicola interviews her Mother and finds out what it must feel like to live with an alcoholic daughter....
Nicola: How does it feel when you see me drink excessively?
Mother: Obviously I am not very happy with the situation. I’m not so bad when I see you have the occasional drink, however you’ve never got a drink out of your hand, which upsets me. slowly your mood changes and you can become argumentative and paranoid. I really do not like that side of you.
Nicola: Do you think I must have had a specific reason to start drinking?
Mother: Looking back over the years I can’t see a specific reason why you would start drinking You weren’t ever ill treated or neither did you have a bad childhood. I always believed people with any addiction had to have a reason i.e. a traumatic childhood, bereavement, loneliness, depression etc. Now I see that’s not the case.
Nicola: Do you find that fact more frustrating ?
Mother: Yes it makes me very frustrated. If you had a reason to start at least you’ve got something to explain and talk about. I suppose if you haven’t got a reason it makes it a lot more difficult for us as well as yourself.
Nicola: How does it make you feel when you see me withdrawing?
Mother: I’ve seen you at your worst withdrawing and it breaks my heart to see you like that. However, I also feel proud that you recognize your problem and are doing something about it.
Nicola: What is the impact on yourself and the family when I relapse?
Mother: Very disappointed seeing all your hard work go to waste. But as I’ve now realised people do relapse all the time. You have to keep trying. Within them months of abstinence you see a fresher, more youthful person. It makes me sad to see you go back to the meak, apathetic person you’re not.
"I'ts hard watching
you kill yourself "
Nicola: Did you realize there was aftercare schemes and help out there?
Mother: No, I didn’t, not until you told me as it‘s not applicable to me.
Nicola: It was very applicable to me and I didn’t even know. How do you feel about that?
Mother: It amazes me that you didn’t know all this time. We could’ve had you back a long time ago.
Nicola: Do you think there should be more advertising?
Mother: Yes, definitely a hell of a lot more.
A Mothers view
6
Alcohol