Things I Should Tell My Mom
written by: Yevin Roh
Mom, you taught me everything that I needed to know.
You were so good at teaching me, I didn’t even know I was being taught.
Mom, thank you for being such a Tiger Mom
No, not in the racialized sense (ok, maybe a little)
But really, I call you my Tiger Mom because you were born in The Year of the Tiger
And you are everything I’d expect from one too
I can only imagine how difficult it was for you being a Tiger in Korea and in America
Because a tiger is fierce, independent, powerful, rebellious, daring,
And as a Korean American, you and I know both of my dominant cultures don’t typically find those features fitting
for females
Maybe that’s why my hegemonic father hurt us, took the car and turned tail.
But I never felt like I was missing out bec ause you gave me everything
I missed, Dad, of course. But really, I never felt like I was missing out on a father because you were all the
parent I needed.
Mom, my Tiger Mom, not only did you give me everything… you did everything!
Cooked, cleaned, worked, got a PhD, tucked me in, and toughened me up
And on top of that, you showed me a full range of emotions!
Love and anger… pride and disappointment… expectation and frustration
You showed me the skills and the feelings of a full person- and didn’t limit yourself to gendered expectations
Luckily, that rubbed off on me
Like a Tiger, you were affectionate, sincere, quick-tempered, and aggressive.
Your love, was also tigerly, love with claws protruding from fur.
And I, was your cub
Was
You see I’m an adult now but I guess I’ll never stop being you son
Gotta let me go and let me grow!
At times I find it easier to lash out than to love
But I remind myself of everything you did for me
All the things you forgave me for.
All the things we endured
And all I want to do is thank you
Thank you for soothing my nightmares and encouraging me to chase my dreams
For challenging me academically and celebrating my success
Thank you for teaching me about the acceptance and understanding of people unlike us
For opportunities that helped me grow into the fullest version of me
Thank you for opening my eyes and my mind!
And the teenage Yevin would have never thought these words would come from my mouth but… Thank you for
forgiving my reckless high school days…
The sneaking out, stealing the car, making you worry, and calling you names
And I ask you, my Tiger Mom, to forgive me for but one more thing- for leaving your protective, furry claws.
Forgive me for venturing out of the cave and into the real world.
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