I am embarking on an unplanned journey with my children. It is a journey fueled by passion and love.When you find and connect with what ultimately matters to you as a parent, it will be your driving force.
This is our story. I have homeschooled my children at one time or another over the last 20 years. I am not a “professionally trained educator”. What I am, is a passionate parent. For us, the only school on the tiny island where we live,did not deliver on the vision of education that I had for my children. I wanted their education to be meaningful, first and foremost. I wanted them to be in an environment that was loving, kind and encouraging and that was a living example of mutual respect, honesty and compassion. I further wanted them to have inquiry based knowledge and the joy of discovery. Unfortunately, this is not your typical school, here, or anywhere for that matter. I do not subscribe to the belief that school, no matter how substandard or unaligned with ones personal beliefs and principals, is a necessary right of passage. How liberating and exciting and terrifying to find that the environment that I wanted for my children,was right here at home.
Our modern society dictates that our children, at an earlier and earlier age, be institutionalized for 6-8 hours a day, 5 days a week. That natural urges to play and explore be curtailed and if any of that instinct is left after a certain stage, then it is given a diagnosis and termed “defective”. There is little freedom after school and extra curricula activities that keep children “busy” and building on an “impressive” looking college applicationfrom kindergarten, is the norm. I did not want this to be the norm for my children. Childhood is such a finite time and I want my children’s to be special and filled with magic and wonder.
We have over the years, recreated school at home, received packaged curriculums in a box, continued testing and keeping scores and grades and then one day, through circumstance and heart resonance, we stopped...and thus began our UNschooling journey. No curriculum, no testing, moving at the child’s pace without the pressure of grade levels and test scores. This path feels right for us.
The world is changing so quickly that it is hard to know what will be important for “success” in the traditional sense, by the time our children reach adulthood. I want them to be happy, I want them to be curious, I want them to be passionate,I want them to be intrinsically motivated. These, for me, are the keys to a successful life. This reality is what has shaped me as a parent, entrusted with raising these amazing individuals. We have joyfully realized that, for us, test scores don’t matter, grade levels don’t matter, that a child feeling good about himself is far more important than how anyone else feels about him/her and that self esteem should not have to be rebuilt so many times during “normal” schooling years.
When you abandon the script and step fully into consciousness, when you get off the wheel and stop spinning and can clearly see who you and who your children are,when you can hear that steady small voice inside you through the din of societal norms, then chances are, you will be bombarded at every turn with the quiet knowledge and the deafening screams of LOVE MATTERS and success for you as a parent, and your vision of success for your children, will be guided by that very principal. So be brave, whatever your guiding princiiple...your kids are counting on you.
Education...It's a Matter of Love
By Tracy Barry
Tracy Barry is the mother of 4 children and owns and manages The Landing Hotel, Harbor Island, Bahamas.
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