Often , if one child lives close to the parents and actively cares for them in their later years , the parents leave that child the bulk of the estate . In such cases , it ' s important for parents to explain their reasoning to their children who live far away and aren ' t actively involved with their care . Organising a family meeting , either in person or online to explain why the parents made their decision on the will in advance " can minimise or eliminate the bad feelings ," Langa says .
Sometimes , depending on family dynamics , an estate lawyer may be the best choice to orchestrate the meeting because an attorney can serve as a neutral force to explain the inner workings of the will .
In some cases , it might be worthwhile to hire a family mediator who has training and experience in handling deeply rooted animosities . One way to anticipate hurt feelings and devise solutions to avoid them is to try viewing the inheritance from every family member ' s viewpoint , Langa says .
Uneven Can Still Be Fair
If one child has been employed irregularly , or has mental health issues , and the other sibling is a physician who earns six-figures a year , it may be easy to understand why their parents would leave the bulk of their estate to the needier child .
" The parents leave more to a struggling child to make sure they have a roof over their head , and the other child may be relieved so that the sister or brother doesn ' t end up on their doorstep ," Langa explains .
Some parents avoid leaving money to their children and bequeath their estate to their grandchildren , to lessen the chances of disharmony ; the grandchildren operate as an intermediary and take the onus off of how much money each child received .
SA Real Estate Investor Magazine NOV 2022 161