The Time Machine Dominic Chua
Every time it came around we’ d all be buzzing in the staff lounge,‘ Oh, what’ s the next joke to play on the boys?’
National Day Flashcard Contigent
We also played a joke on the whole Secondary 3 level. We got the fiercest teacher we could find, Mr Moses Wong, because we knew the students were least likely to suspect a prank from him. We got him to write a memo to the Secondary 3 students using the school letterhead. The note went something like this:
‘ Dear Boys, due to unforeseen circumstances, all RI Sec 3 students have been asked to take part in the National Day Parade Flashcard Contingent. The following boys are exempted:
1) All students who wear spectacles
2) All students who are left-handed
3) Students from Malaysia
The following are the rehearsal dates( they were all Sundays!).’
We also planned answers to questions that the students would probably raise, and how to break it to the boys that it was an April Fools’ joke. One more memorable one involved the teachers creating flashcards of letters to take into class that would form the words‘ April’ s
Fool’— the boys were told to form a word using the letters as part of a‘ rehearsal’ for the first practice! The word was, of course,‘ April Fool’.
As we predicted, the boys asked about the strange exemptions. We gave them the silliest answers we could think of, but they took us so seriously!
‘ Why are students who wear spectacles exempted, ma’ am?’
‘ Oh, you know, because flashcard contingents cannot have spectacles reflecting the sunlight, otherwise it’ ll dazzle the spectators on the opposite end of the stadium.’
Centre: Mr Moses Wong
‘ Why not left-handed guys, ma’ am?’
‘ Oh, because you need the right hand to flip the flashcards.’
There was one question we didn’ t anticipate— we didn’ t have very many foreign students in the school at that time, and they were mainly Malaysians. We forgot that we had Indonesian students too! So one Indonesian boy( in Mrs Alba’ s class I believe) stood up—‘ I am Indonesian, why am I not exempted?’
‘ Because we buy water from Malaysia,’ was her pokerfaced reply.
All this happened between 1991 and 1993. I went off to MOE HQ after that, and wasn’ t sure if the teachers kept up the April Fools’ tradition, but we lived for April Fools’ Day! Every time it came around we’ d all be buzzing in the staff lounge,‘ Oh, what’ s the next joke to play on the boys?’
Rafflesian Times
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