Pure M Magazine ISSUE 5 | Page 30

Exist Immortal Darkness of an Age (Deluxe Edition) T Review by Jonathan Monahan 3.2 he review itself starts a bit further down, the first six paragraphs are just a brief explanation for those people who have no idea what any of this metal stuff is about. Metal is weird, but not in the way that the people who listen to it would want normal people to think. One of the many reasons it’s so odd is its fans – again, not in the way you’d think. They’re among the most loyal of any fanbase, really. Sure, a gang-banger might shoot you for dissing Tupac, but a metalhead will find your Facebook and tell you you should die in all manner of inventive ways because you don’t get it. Some people mistake that as aggression, but it really is loyalty. This loyalty is why absolutely nothing I have to say here actually matters, but I’ll explain that toward the end of this summary. You see, there are three types of people who will see this review is about a metal band and they’ll all react predictably. The first set will see the name Exist Immortal and see the genre and immediately think ‘NO. Not a chance in hell, I’m going back to listening to The Notorious D.R.E and his nice music about police framing drug dealers by arresting them for carrying drugs; or some Avicii Guetta, because he’s a super cool awesome talented guy.’ These people were a lost cause from the get-go, so I don’t think it’ll bother the band. The second set will have heard Enter Sandman at some point during the noughties, through a quirky male friend with long hair or female friend with short hair, and assume that’s all that metal really is. They will or won’t listen to the track attached, depending on their reaction to the above-mentioned sandmanning. If they do, almost all of them will panic and do something violent to their keyboard to turn it off, some will laugh a little out of fright, and maybe one person will feel a connection and read/listen on. Things could only have gotten better than type one, in fairness. The third set is the one Exist Immortal is aiming for – the true blue metalheads who grew up on a steady diet of Sabbath, Slayer, Anthrax, and later on, Killswitch Engage – remember that last one. This third set makes up about 2% of the market, according to the numbers I just pulled out of my arse to prove my own point. You’d think that these people would all love it, being such a small group with so much in common, but you’d be very wrong. Because… METAL. Or more specifically, subgenres of metal. Black metal, classic metal, power metal, thrash metal, nu metal, hair metal, folk metal, metalcore, neo-classical metal, and goblin metal (whatever the fuck that is) are just a few subgenres. There are a bunch more if you want to check out on some fact-based website; in fact, there are quite possibly more subgenres of metal than seats in a symphony orchestra. So, why is there such 30