Program Success 16 September 2017
Front Cover Feature Padrika Gray Author , Musician , Guitar Live Empowered Now Jacksonville , Florida September 2017
When I was growmg up , life didn ' t ask me if I was timid or shy . Life didn ' t ask : Oh are you an introvert ; are you reserved ? My apologies , I won ' t bother you with this difficult situation , I ' ll just move on to the next person . Really ? I learned early about consequences , and they scared me . I was full of fear , afraid of failure , afraid of success , had a lack of confidence and a lack of courage , had a need for acceptance , and was uncomfortable talking to people . My remedy for dealing with all those fears was silence . Somehow , I thought my silence would save me from the consequences of life . Sometimes we struggle with the thought that our lives are nothing to talk about ; or that we don ' t have anything worth sharing with others that might be impactful . Listen , I ' m 58 and in my life-time I ' ve been on the club scene about three times . I consumed an alcoholic beverage 3 or 4 times , I never smoked anything , I ' ve been to one so-called wild party . I didn ' t like eating out by myself , and have felt more comfortable following , rather than leading . How boring does that sound ? But who ' s to say the things I didn ' t do much of , was necessarily what I should have been doing anyway ? In hindsight , some of my silence was not necessarily a bad thing . Between the ups and downs and periods of inactivity and silence , I learned how to play the bass guitar ( that alone often draws more attention than my personality can stand ); I ' ve traveled to the Grand Canyon and to Las Vegas . I ' ve traveled to New York and was able to see the first Broadway production of the Wiz , when Stephanie Mills played the star role of Dorothy - and I sat in the balcony right next to her mom ! I ' ve been on cruise after cruise after cruise . I obtained my Bachelor ' s Degree . I was the first one in my family to land that high paying job that I could retire from . I became an author , twice . Amazingly , I was able to experience some fun and exciting things in those silent years . But the one dream that I really wanted