3 " Magical " Methods to Eliminate Office Conflict ... Even if Your Wand is Broken by Monica Wofford , CSP
Selma is whining that Frank isn ' t pulling his weight ; Bob is barking at James for not coming in on time and you ' re about to burst if one more person yells , fusses , or utters another negative word that interrupts your work . Office conflict is rampant and it seems to be spreading to your office faster than a plague , but how do you stop it ?
The new release Make Difficult People
Disappear shares a plethora of powerful antidotes to the disease of negativity , stress , and conflict at the office , yet here are three of the top ideas you can use quickly , even if your magic wand seems perpetually in the shop .
Increase the Rewards and Consequences People do what they get paid attention to for doing . When a leader listens and adds to a conflict ridden conversation , that leader is actually rewarding and reinforcing the sharing of negativity . If Bob ' s bark is much worse than his bit , James learns and is trained to tolerate the barking and keep doing what he ' s been doing . If nothing is done about Frank ' s shirking of the workload , Frank will continue his actions and Selma , who may be a high performer , will eventually tire and leave . Not only do people do what they are paid attention for , in the absence of compelling rewards and consequences , they will do whatever is easiest . Many leaders , though well meaning , miss this mark . More work provided when the initial work is done is not a reward that says " yay , you ", it ' s a consequence and trains workers to finish projects more slowly . When a significant policy is broken and nothing is said beyond " please don ' t do that again ", this is not a consequence of note and depending on the policy may actually reward the very behavior that needs to stop . Implement motivating rewards and enforceable consequences and conflict among employees trying to manage each other will rapidly dissipate .
Raise Awareness While most know intellectually that all do not communicate the same , our conscious awareness of those differences or the lack thereof , creates conflict . Raise the awareness and the emotional intelligence at the office by helping all understand the distinct styles and motivations of their colleagues . Someone who is motivated by " getting things done ", referred to in the book as a Commander , will communicate much more in bullet form , with an emphasis on immediate action , results , and efficiency . An employee who is more laid back , easy going , focused on the needs of team members and skilled in empathy , likely motivated by " getting along with others ", a complete stranger to conflict , and what the book refers to as Relaters , will not be focused on efficiency , but effectiveness of team member inclusivity and engagement . While both provide immeasurable value to the team , their communication style couldn ' t be farther apart and more readily misunderstood by the other party , creating an environment ripe for continued conflict born out of simple misunderstanding and miscommunications .
Manage Expectation With a raised awareness comes a shift in expectations of the behavior of others . Without it , employees expect their colleagues to behave in just the same way with just the same needs and expectations . It ' s as if we look at a German shepherd expecting it to act like a Jack Russell and then get mad at the small dog for not acting big and regal . The same occurs when we label a colleague as difficult and continue to expect them to act in way that is colored with sunshine and roses . How we expect others to behave guides our reactions and yet it is our own expectations that have fallen short , not the other pa1ty . For example , when an employee is expected to fully analyze a situation , gather all data and assimilate it into a methodical formula , what would be referred to as the behavior of an Organizer in Make Difficult People Disappear , but finds it more important to light up a room , focus on a positive and social environment , and inspire or demonstrate spontaneous creativity , referred to as Entertainer behaviors , the aforementioned expectations will cause frustration with the outcome . Conflict occurs when we demand and expect others to behave in a way that is not natural or known .
Make Difficult People isn ' t about magic really , it ' s about mindset . Those we work with who create conflict are often not being difficult , but are truly different in their approach . With a raised awareness , more rewards and consequences and an altered and shared set of expectations that conflict effectively vanishes . You can make conflict , stress , and difficult people disappear ... even if your wand is broken .
About the Author
3 Magical Methods to make DifficultPeple Disappear Monica Wofford Life Coach and Trainer Jacksonville , Florida New Year ' s 2015
NEW BOOK NOW AVAILABLE AS A TRAINING CLASS !
Tired of Dealing with Difficult People ?
Make them go away ...
It ' s easier than you think to elevate the communication flow in your office . Bring the magic of Make Difficult People Disappear to life by requesting this new training class for your office . Key benefits of this half or full day course include :
• How to motivate employees
• How to get everyone to stop taking stuff personally
• How to shift mindsets from intolerance to acceptance
• How to remove the labels that create and maintain conflict
• How to align your expectations with their capabilities
Special offers are available NOW when you schedule your Make Difficult People Disappear course with the purchase of books for each participant . Call now so you can stop " dealing " with those who are difficult and start focusing on what ' s really important to you I
To schedule your course and for more information , call Contagious Companies , Inc at 1-866-382-0121
Monica Wofford , CSP is a leadership development expert , CEO of Contagious Companies , Inc . and author of Make Difficult People Disappear . To learn more , email : Monica @ ContagiousCompanies . com , go to www . ContagiousCompanies . com , or call 1-866-382-0121 .
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